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…dancing with the devil in the city of angels…

Category Archives: Smells Like Science

Posts about studies and research on why men and gay guys do the things they do.

Say, “Cheese!”

10 Friday Apr 2015

Posted by Bangkokbois in Smells Like Science

≈ 3 Comments

My compliments to the chef.

My compliments to the chef.

I assume my regular diet is healthy ‘cuz I’ve eaten a lot of fruits in my life. Not to mention all the protein from meat I’ve digested. Fish, not so much. As for veggies, I think those are best left for lesbians to enjoy. Which should provide you with a mental picture that’ll keep you off that foodstuff for life. The Department of Agriculture and the Department of Health and Human Services, who jointly issue the Dietary Guidelines for Americans, may disagree. But then they can never agree on just which foods are healthy for you and which are not anyway. They update the guidelines every five years, and every five years switch between eggs being good for you or eggs being the food from hell. Considering the average ballooning waistline of my fellow countrymen, they’d do better providing guidance on whether a triple scoop of Ben & Jerry’s Chunky Monkey or Haagen Dazs’ Caramel Cone is best way for you to go.

Fortunately moms never paid much attention to the Dietary Guidelines for Americans. Sure, she occasionally tried to convince us kids that lima beans were food, but then she has always had a wicked sense of humor. More importantly, she never trained our taste buds to consider mac and cheese a dietary delight. I’ve had friends who would get hard at the suggestion there was mac and cheese headed toward their dinner plate. Note I said ‘had’. That stuff is gross. I assume if you were banal enough to order mac and cheese at a 5-star Italian restaurant it might be palatable. But the stuff that comes in a box that Americans love . . . you’d be better off eating the box. It’s no surprise mac and cheese was invented by the English.

But they say you are what you eat, not to mention that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Which should clue you in to fact that when it comes to sex, food matters. And yup, that smells like science to me. Unless someone is burning a pot of mac and cheese on the stove top again.

Ooops. You said hot cheese, not hot Chee. My bad.

Ooops. You said hot cheese, not hot Chee. My bad.

Perhaps it was the study from last September that found that men with prodigious bellies lasted an average of five minutes longer in the sack than their thinner brethren that convinced the folks from the dating app Skout to survey their membership’s dining habits. What they discovered was that among the 4,600 participants, those who rated grilled cheese sandwiches as a yummy treat also rated sex as the thing that got their juices flowing. 73% said not only do they love grilled cheese, but that they make love at least six times per month. Only 27% of those who gave the sandwiches a thumbs down had that active of a sex life. So now we know if it’s through a man’s stomach that you’re attempting to land him, he’ll put out more often if you serve him grilled cheese sandwiches.

Skout didn’t explain why they focused on that particular food to set the bar for the gooey treat and gooey sex parallel, but did discover that those who liked the snack are better all-around. Aficionados also love to travel and consider themselves to be adventurous, and are 20% more likely to be charitable than those who aren’t that big on being served grilled cheese. Regardless of how it is served.

But among the sex fiends who gobble grilled cheese sandwiches on a regular basis, it’s all about dairy. 41% say it’s gotta be American (although a true cheese over would debate the right to call that stuff cheese) while a mere 2% feel brie needs to be made any more gooey. And white bread seems the preferred way to go with 51% weighing in in favor of enriched flour. With crust. 28% of the picky, sexless eaters who don’t care for grilled cheese are anti-crust people too, while only 10% of grilled cheese lovers would bother cutting it off. But then cheese and the uncircumcised have a long history together.

But don't forget that grilling your meat is popular too.

But don’t forget that grilling your meat is popular too.

Grilled cheese fans seem to live a ‘the more the merrier life’ too. 60% like melting more than one type of cheese between their bread and almost half like to throw in a few more goodies, like pesto and tomato. Which probably bodes well for you if you are into sex toys. So if you inherited a box of Velveeta from your grandmother, don’t throw it away, throw it between two slices of bread on the grill and land yourself a hottie who’s into an active sex life.

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That's Nuts!

That’s Nuts!

Light My Fire

26 Thursday Mar 2015

Posted by Bangkokbois in Smells Like Science

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Now that's hot.

Now that’s hot.

I read a lot of fiction, primarily books loosely defined as thrillers. So cops, private eyes, and agents of shadowy quasi-governmental organizations are the norm. And because it’s one of the things the USA is #1 in, that means lots of serial killers. That’s a good thing. ‘Cuz it’s helps teach you those things not to do to keep cops, private eyes, and agents of shadowy quasi-governmental organizations from pegging you as one. Not to mention your neighbors will generally think higher of you too.

You’d think The 7 Warning Signs That You Might Be A Serial Killer would include handy tips like not keeping body parts in your refrigerator. But then as obvious as that may seem, considering some of the things I’ve seen in the refrigerators of tricks I’ve done, the occasional dismembered arm or foot doesn’t really rate high on the I Think I’m About To Heave scale. So a better tip would be why not to buy cheap brands of plastic wrap. Or the importance of labeling the meats you’ve stuffed into your freezer. But instead writers of cop, private eye, and agents of shadowy quasi-governmental organizations books go with the tried and trued, the rather skimpy list of serial killer traits that FBI profilers tend to rely on. Like bed wetting.

No problemo. Bed wetting is neither a habit nor a fetish of mine. Spending the night sleeping in a bed soaked in urine is no more enticing than spending a weekend at Disneyland. Although I do remember once as a small child sneaking into my brother’s bedroom and peeing on his bed. It’s probably a good thing he’s never been suspected of being a serial killer. Yet.

Light My Fire 2

Evidently serial killers hone their craft by practicing on small animals too. That’d be torturing, maiming, and killing them. Not peeing on them. That one is a bit more problematic. I’m not a member of PETA, but do agree maiming and torturing small animals is wrong. As a concept. But my neighbor has one of those tiny, cat-like, yappy dogs and both it and I know that one day it’ll have yapped once too much and my career as a serial killer will be off to a satisfying start.

Whenever a serial killer is caught and the media interviews his neighbors they always say what a quiet and polite man he was. That they would never have suspected his favorite hobby relied on a high body count. I can’t imagine any of my neighbors – even those who don’t own a tiny, yappy dog – ever referring to me as polite. Neighbors are highly overrated. And I wish more of mine had their house foreclosed on during the recent real estate bubble bust. I know. That sounds heartless. But between losing the home you never should have been qualified to purchase in the first place and becoming the victim of a serial killer, I think I’ve taken the high road. Besides, that’s a few less souls to be telling the media what a quiet and polite man I appeared to be. As though they never noticed my Free Charlie Manson bumper sticker.

My biggest concern on the 7 Warning Signs That You Might Be A Serial Killer list, however, is pyromania. I mean who in their right mind doesn’t love fire? Even the Christian god lit up a bush to celebrate coming up with his 10 Commandments. Spending the weekend in the great outdoors sucks without a good camp fire. And no one spends every summer weekend barbecuing just because they have a love affair with hot dogs. If it wasn’t for fire we wouldn’t have firemen. And that would mean a hell of a lot less masturbatory fantasies. Not to mention stroking it while you watch hot, live firemen attempt to put out your neighbor’s burning house. The one who used to have that tiny, yappy, cat-like dog.

One of the side benefits of fire is hot firemen.

One of the side benefits of fire is hot firemen.

I don’t think playing with fire should be considered a sign that you might be a serial killer. In fact, I think playing with fire should be taught in kindergarten instead of finger painting. It’s a much more useful skill set. And could help the bed wetters dry out their sheets. I think the anti-pyromaniac crowd might even be a bit homophobic. ‘Cuz you know how much some of ya like to flame. Playing with fire is fun. Everyone enjoys the pastime. Even bar boys in Bangkok love the part of the show they get to walk out naked with burning candles in their hands. And what could be more hotter than that?

Okay, so maybe there is a small difference between starting fires and playing with fire, but baby steps, ya know? And thanks to the YouTube video 10 Fun Things You Can Do To Play With Fire, you too may soon have a new hobby. That may not help me stay under the radar of cops, private eyes, and agents of shadowy quasi-governmental organizations ferreting out potential serial killers, but there’s safety in numbers and once you’ve seen how much fun burning a ping pong ball can be, you won’t just push past that annoying barker trying to get you upstairs for a Sexy Show! in Patpong ever again. Enjoy.

(Click on the photo for the video . . . you know ya want to.)

(Click on the photo for the video . . . you know ya want to.)

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Hannibal Lecter Can Eat My . . .

Addicted to Celluloid Dick

20 Friday Mar 2015

Posted by Bangkokbois in Smells Like Science

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Some addictions are better for you than others.

Some addictions are better for you than others.

Years ago I had a roommate who was addicted to gay porn. Not a boyfriend, just a roommate. Okay, so he’d been a boyfriend, but by the time we moved in together the bloom was off the rose and we’d just became friends. With an occasional upgrade to fuck buddy status. As roommates go, it was an ideal living situation. I worked a regular Monday through Friday, 9 to 5 job, he worked late nights and weekends. I rarely saw him since our time at the house seldom over-lapped. Unfortunately, when it did I’d see far too much of him. He spent all of his free time splayed out naked in the living room watching gay porn on the wide screen. Which accounts for his occasional upgrade to fuck buddy status.

You’d think coming home to a hot naked stud who was always primed, ready, and willing would be a little slice of heaven. Especially one whose birthday you didn’t have to remember. Or your anniversary. Or any of the other stupid occasions that cause turmoil for forgetting when two guys become a couple and one of them starts acting like a little bitch. ‘Cuz a bitch in heat only cares that you remembered to bring the lube. But a surround sound system blaring Jeff Stryker’s catch phrase, “Yeah, suck that big cock!” in THX isn’t quite the, “Hi honey, how was work today?” you’d expect, and it got old pretty fast. Like about eight months after we’d signed the lease.

His porn hobby was an all encompassing one. He was always either watching porn, or making a trip to the local video rental shop for a new batch of porn tapes, or copying his favorite porn scenes onto his collection of gay porn mixed video tapes. He had several hundred of them. Stored in what should have been the coat closet. Which invariably led to a first-time visitor to the house thinking he was gonna hang up his coat only to be greeted by shelves full of homemade videos with titles like Best Blow Jobs, Biggest Black Cocks, and Anal Action +++, instead of the hanger he’d expected to find. Most took it in stride. My moms, not so much.

Watching gay porn often requires a bit of multi-tasking.

Watching gay porn often requires a bit of multi-tasking.

Not quite knowing the best way to stage an intervention for someone addicted to watching gay porn, one day I suggested that perhaps his hobby was keeping him from enjoying sex with an actual human being. Other than himself. His reply was a garbled, “Mmmurghph.” So I took my dick out of his mouth and told him I didn’t think his obsession with gay porn was a healthy pastime. He claimed watching porn was educational. Even if it was obvious he’d already earned his PhD. And while his actual male-on-male body contact was limited, he said by watching all that porn he was becoming a better lover, that he’d been learning new and better techniques. Which I couldn’t really argue with. Other than that watching a porn star use an orange traffic cone as a dildo might not be the type of sexual repertoire that would lead to a satisfied bed partner. I’m sure he had some excuse for that point too, but by then I couldn’t understand anything he was saying again. So at least he’d learned not to talk when your mouth is full.

Despite a roommate whose availability for giving blow jobs was more reliable than the refrigerator’s ice maker doing its job, his claim that watching porn made him a better lover smelled like a bunch of lame excuses. But researchers at Concordia University and UCLA recently reported that watching lots of porn may in fact mean a healthier sex life. And that change in scents means yup, it smells like science to me.

The study published in the online journal Sexual Medicine suggests that men who regularly watch porn may enjoy greater desire and sexual arousal when having sex with their partners. Researchers surveyed 280 men, asking them how many hours per week they spent watching porn, their levels of sexual desire, and their experiences with erectile function. Their findings suggest that many popular stereotypes about porn don’t hold up and that watching porn may indeed have a place in a healthy sex life within a relationship.

Does an overindulgence in watching porn lead to a lonely sex life?

Does an overindulgence in watching porn lead to a lonely sex life?

Previously, the general opinion of porn addicts was that their obsession with watching porn could lead to problems with getting or sustaining an erection; that men who love their porn become desensitized to the actual act of having sex. But Nicole Prause, associate research scientist in the Department of Psychiatry in the UCLA Semel Institute for Neuroscience and Human Behavior, and Jim Pfaus, professor in Concordia’s Department of Psychology and Center for Studies in Behavioral Neurobiology, says their study shows the opposite to be true.

“When we analyzed the data from these prior studies, we found that the men who had watched more sex films at home were more aroused when they watched sex films in the lab,” says Prause. He says their research showed that men who watched more than 25 porn tapes per week responded more strongly to sexual stimuli – even very vanilla erotica – than the guys for whom porn movies were more novel. “While this association doesn’t establish a cause, it proves viewing erotica at home is not desensitizing and perhaps even sensitized the men to respond more strongly,” he says.

And Pfaus says that watching porn is not only good for you, but good for your relationship too. “Many clinicians claim that watching erotica makes men unable to respond sexually to ‘normal’ sexual situations with a partner,” he says. “That was not the case in our sample.”

Here's to your health.

Here’s to your health.

Pfaus says that of the 280 volunteers who agreed to stroke it in the name of science, 127 were in a relationship with a regular sex partner, representing a good cross-section of men that view porn on a regular basis. He claims that his research shows that rather than porn hijacking men’s libidos and setting up unrealistic expectations for real-life sex, viewing more sex films is associated with a stronger sex drive, including the desire to have sex with a partner. “Sex films,” Pfaus says, “may be able to ‘stoke the fire.’” And that’s a lot of stroking going on.

Despite their study’s results backing up their hypothesis that an overindulgence in porn can turn you into a little sex machine, the pair of men in white coats acknowledged that it was possible the men in their study who watched more porn had a stronger sex drive in the first place. But that doesn’t stop them from claiming that watching porn can be good for what ails you. “The most common error of thinking with respect to men and porn is that all porn is bad for men all of the time,” Prause said. “The truth is probably that some porn is good for some men in some situations. The challenge is to identify when sex films are most likely to be helpful.” And that was a challenge my old roommate was always up for.

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Taking Care of You

11 Wednesday Mar 2015

Posted by Bangkokbois in Smells Like Science

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Bangkok's gay gogo bar owners want to take care of you.

Bangkok’s gay gogo bar owners want to take care of you.

Old hands and sexpats love nothing more than bitching about the high drinks cost at gogo bars on Soi Twilight. Okay, old hands and sexpats love to bitch period. But a perennial favorite is whining about how much that first drink at a Bangkok gogo bar costs. It’s around ten bucks these days. Which does sound pricey. Until you remember you are not just paying for a drink, you are paying for the treat of watching a bunch of naked dudes cavorting around the stage. Which the old hands and sexpats never seem capable of remembering. Or they wouldn’t whine so much. ‘Cuz getting to watch a bunch of naked guys do those things naked guys tend to do is priceless.

While none of those whiners actually knows what it cost to run a bar that offers hot and cold running boys in Bangkok, they will gladly tell you the exorbitant prices charged for drinks are because bar owners are greedy and care more about profits than they do about their customers. And predicting the downfall of those bars because of that greed is almost as enjoyable as bitching about how much they’re charging. Dreamboys – who tends to lead the price increase in each round – is often cited as an example of owner greed. Yet that bar has been going strong for years, with no sign its popularity is waning. Huh. So are gogo bar owners greedy bastards who deserve the bankruptcy surely headed their way? Or are they just astute businessmen who know what their product is worth?

Yup. Smells like science to me.

It turns out portraying gogo bar owners are uncaring capitalistic pigs is a disservice to the industry. ‘Cuz science says, just like the boys in their stables, bar owners’ real concern is about taking care of you. And considering what they have to work with, that ain’t no easy job. Finding boys to willingly strut their stuff on stage isn’t difficult. Enticing sex tourists into their establishment to drool over those boys isn’t much of a task either. But convincing the boys to spend a night going one-on-one with an ancient, gelatinously obese, smelly, myopic, bald, farang whose cynicism, anger and disillusionment are palpable can be a Herculean task. Unless you get them drunk first. And I don’t mean the boys.

Size always matters.

Size always matters.

No problemo. Researchers at the University of Bristol have just discovered what Bangkok’s gogo bar owners already knew to be true. Your attractiveness increases greatly after you’ve had a shot of your favorite liquor. In the study, published in the journal Alcohol and Alcoholism – which wouldn’t be a bad new catch phrase for Pattaya – 40 participants were photographed three times — sober, after one glass of wine, and after two glasses of wine. Then their photos were shown to a new group of people who were asked to rate their attractiveness in side-by-side comparisons. They were either shown a participant’s sober photo nest to his one-drink shot, or his sober photo against the two-drink shot.

Invariably, participants selected the photos of those who had downed a drink as being the most attractive the majority of the time. The researchers are not sure why, but suggest it could be due to pupil dilation – which is a positive trait to viewers – or muscle relation, or rosier cheeks. In any case the results are the same. “It suggests that people are rated as more attractive once they’ve consumed a small amount of alcohol,” said the study’s senior researcher, Marcus Munafò, a professor of biological psychology. “What it means is that alcohol is sort of hijacking that mechanism, or promoting the aspects of facial features that we regard as attractive for other reasons,” he says.

The conclusion of the study was that in addition to perceiving others as more attractive, a mildly intoxicated alcohol consumer may also be perceived as more attractive by others. Which in turn may play a role in the relationship between alcohol consumption and risky sexual behavior. “You consume a drink, so you see other people as more attractive,” Munafò said. “But you also become more attractive yourself because you’ve consumed a drink.” And that’s a win-win in anyone’s book.

I'll drink to that.

I’ll drink to that.

That’s the good news. The bad news is that there is a limit to how attractive booze can make you. A quick glance in the mirror should clue you into that fact. ‘Cuz while study participants found a single shot upped the attractiveness level of drinkers, drink #2 made that rating head south. After two drinks, participants found their sober photos more attractive than the high-alcohol head shots. And that’s a sobering bit of news.
The researchers did not test the attractiveness of subjects who had drank more than two shots. ‘Cuz even scientists wouldn’t attempt to float the hypothesis that anyone finds a falling-down drunk attractive. Even one with a fat wallet. Or at last call.

So despite all those nasty things you’ve been saying about Bangkok’s gogo bar owners, the truth is they know their business, they know their boys, and they care about you. Demanding that you buy a drink – which is considered a cover charge everywhere else in the world – is ‘cuz they know it will help you appear just a bit more attractive to the boys. And by pricing their drinks high, they discourage you from drinking the amount that will allow the boys to remember just how disgusting you really are. That those prices add to their bottom line is just a happy coincidence. Because what they really care about is your happy ending.

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Forget About The Size Of His Feet . . .

23 Monday Feb 2015

Posted by Bangkokbois in Smells Like Science

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Wanting to hold hands with you might not be a sign or his affection but rather a sign he's hiding the evidence of his cheating ways.

Wanting to hold hands with you might not be a sign or his affection but rather a sign he’s hiding the evidence of his cheating ways.

As an indicator of what truly matters in a man, many guys get excited at the sight of someone wearing size 14 shoes. Others claim it’s all about the Adam’s apple. And a few who’ve never heard the story about Pinocchio claim a man’s nose tells you everything you need to know about him. But once you’ve unpeeled his package and discovered whether you were right or wrong, a closer look at his hands may be in order. ‘Cuz if you’re thinking he’s a keeper, that may be what indicates whether or not – or how soon – he’ll be cheating on you.

And yup, that smells like science to me.

According to researchers at the University of Oxford’s Department of Experimental Psychology and Northumbria University, not all men cheat. But all men are inclined towards either promiscuity or fidelity in their relationships. You’d think the difference between the faithful and the unfaithful would be how often their partner whines and acts like a little bitch. But science says that while those traits may give cause to dump someone, guys with a roving eye can blame their inability to keep it in their pants on their ring finger.

The study analyzed surveys about how participants felt about non-committal sex from 1,314 men from the UK and North America. They found that those whose ring finger was longer than their index finger were more likely to be promiscuous than those whose index finger out-distanced their ring finger. The researchers believed the underlying cause was that the cheaters had been exposed to more testosterone in the womb. Dick size, however, was not measured in the study, so being more popular as a cause for infidelity did not affect the researchers conclusions.

Looks like a guy with a short index finger to me.

Looks like a guy with a short index finger to me.

Professor Robin Dunbar, who spearheaded the research, said his work showed that within sexual relationships there were clusters of men more inclined to ‘stay’ and a separate cluster of men more inclined to ‘stray’. “It is important to note that these differences are very subtle, and are only visible when we look at large groups of people,” he said. Of course when you’re talking a large cluster of men, the urge to ‘stray’ is always gonna come out of tops.

As a cause for being a cheater, being born that way ain’t a bad excuse. The only problem is that what’s good for the gander is good for the other gander too. And researchers at the University of California at Berkeley already published a study that concluded while in most men the index finger is usually the shorter of the two digits, among gay men the length of their ring finger was generally significantly longer. Which poses the question, are all gay men prone to cheating, or are those men with a propensity to stray just smart enough to know they can score more partners if they stick to men?

The Agony Of Da Feet

04 Thursday Dec 2014

Posted by Bangkokbois in Smells Like Science

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These feet were made for walking.

These feet were made for walking.

Ya know what they say about a man with big feet. But shoe size doesn’t just mean a happy super-sized ending. At least not just for you. ‘Cuz those who walk large, walk all over the place too. According to IllicitEncounters.com, a nefarious online dating website for married folks seeking a bit of hanky panky on the side, guys with big feet are big cheaters. And if anyone should know, it’s the membership of a website dedicated to laying anyone and everyone who isn’t their partner.

According to David Perrett, a specialist in psychology and neuroscience at the University of St. Andrews, men with big feet may cheat more often, but it’s not their fault. It’s just that in all things, size matters. “Body proportions are related and big shoes will likely mean a bigger, taller body,” he says. “Body stature will relate to personality. Size will enable individuals to dominate in social situations. Dominance itself may open opportunities for affairs.”

And the 3,100 men who participated in IllicitEncounters’ survey agreed. The site’s research matched gentlemen’s shoe sizes against the percentage of guys seeking extramarital affairs. What researchers found was that guys with feet larger than size 10 are three times more likely to cheat on their partners than those with size seven to nine. And while men may lie, numbers seldom do.

da feat 2

IllicitEncounters found that 18 percent of their membership had size seven feet. Of that 18 percent, just 4 percent reported that they would cheat on their partner. By contrast, 22 percent with size 11 shoes and 16 percent with sizes 12 to 13 shoes said that they would consider being unfaithful. That number probably would have been higher, but a lot of the guys with big feet were busy knocking one off with some stranger.

Of course IllicitEncounters’ research may be faulty. Because even though it’s a common misconception that you can predict the size of a man’s penis by observing his shoe size – when we all know that’s what the size of his package is for – no one really wants to risk ruining their relationship by cheating with a shorty. So it may not be that guys with big feet cheat more, but just that they have more opportunities for doing so.

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Stalking The Elusive Bisexual Male

21 Friday Nov 2014

Posted by Bangkokbois in Smells Like Science

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What's the difference between a bi guy and a gay guy? Pronunciation.

What’s the difference between a bi guy and a gay guy? Pronunciation.

Like Big Foot and the Loch Ness Monster, bi guys are a quirk of nature that few have ever seen but many assume to exist. We almost had proof when Tom Daley kinda sorta came out, but quickly learned that by bi he meant bottoming for Dustin Lance Black. Bisexuality isn’t so much about a state of mind as it is a state of sexual development. ‘Cuz guys who claim to be bi today usually become tomorrow’s gay men. Except for the self identified straight ones who just had too much to drink. They become tomorrow’s fuck buddy.

It’s one of the benefits of being an out gay man. All the straight guys you know know just who to go to when curiosity gets the better of them. Then they often act like they no longer know you. Until the next time they decide they need a penis to play with. Some self-identified straight guys continue to straddle the line between gay and straight, even when their hottest sexual encounters are being straddled by another man. They claim to be bi because they don’t want to admit to themselves that they are gay. But denial ain’t just a river in Egypt, and the penis always knows.

Dr Qazi Rahman, an assistant professor in Cognitive Biology at Queen Mary University in London knows too. He’s an expert in the study of gender, sexuality, and homosexuality. Note that he doesn’t study bisexuality. ‘Cuz he says, at least in men, there ain’t no such thing. Or if there is you are more likely to be struck by lightening and win the lottery than you are to ever actually meet one. Not that that stops some men from claiming they are. But Dr. Qazi says the problem with studies that report a statistical number of bisexual men is that they rely on self-reporting and self-identification. And as everyone knows, all men lie. Especially when it comes to dick.

bi guys 2

Instead, Dr, Qazi says he has a better way. And it’s called a penile plethysmograph. Which is a mouthful. But it also provides a different level of insight because it’s looking at the involuntary physical response of a man’s genitals. Or in laymen’s terms, it’s a lie detector for penis.

The penile plethysmograph, or phallometry measures changes in the circumference of the penis. A stretchable band with mercury in it is fitted around the subject’s penis. The band is connected to a machine with a video screen and data recorder. Any changes in penis size, even those not felt by the subject, are recorded while the subject views sexually suggestive or pornographic pictures or movies. Computer software is used to develop graphs showing the degree of arousal to each stimulus. The machines, which cost about $8,000 were first developed in Czechoslovakia to prevent draft dodgers from claiming they were gay just to avoid military duty. Dr. Qazi uses his to measure blood flow to the penis, which is a strong indicator of sexual attraction and arousal.

In his studies, Dr. Qazi chose to show participants film clips of two lesbians doing disgusting things to each other, and clips of hot,sweaty man on man action. Not just because he assumed gay participants would vomit if show straight sex scenes, but because he believed that straight men would respond to naked female breasts no matter what they were doing and gay men would get hard when a pair of penises appeared while the breeders among them would not. And, for the most part that’s what happened.

bi guys 3

“In physical response studies we find that self-identified straight men and self-identified gay men respond as you would expect,” says Qazi. “Straight men are more aroused by watching footage of same-sex activity between women; gay men are more aroused by watching footage of same-sex activity between men.”

But when it comes to the self-deluded, the responses are not what they’d hoped for. Dr Qazi says in his studies 95% of self-identified bisexual men are only aroused by the footage of same-sex activity between men, the remaining 5% are only aroused by the footage of same-sex activity between women.” Ergo, the majority of guys claiming to be bi only get aroused by gay sex while a small minority obviously claim to be bi ‘cuz they think it will help them more easily score some pussy.

Dr. Qazi says his research shows that male sexuality appears to be category specific. “The bottom line is that while social effects will play a part in the way that sexual attraction is expressed, sexual orientation is essentially innate,” he claims. As for the existence of truly bisexual men, Qazi says, “Bisexual males may exist but it’s likely that the numbers may be so low that it’s almost impossible to identify them through the available research. However the prevailing scientific view is that bisexuality in males doesn’t physiologically exist.”

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03 Friday Oct 2014

Posted by Bangkokbois in Smells Like Science

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That's, That's Gay

Bros who smile together, play together.

Bros who smile together, play together.

You probably already knew that smiles are contagious. You probably already knew that boners were too. And you probably already knew that if you throw in a bit of booze the chances of that guy smiling at you resulting in the aforementioned boners are greatly increased. But thanks to a new study published in Clinical psychological Science, we now have scientific proof that grinning and getting an erection go hand in hand provided he’s been drinking like a fish. Well, not exactly ‘cuz when fish drink they don’t get as friendly as guys do. But I’d score that as a point for the homo team.

With far too much governmental grant funds on their hands, scientists at the University of Pittsburgh decided to delve deeper into a phenomenon known as emotional contagion, in which without realizing it, your emotional state is affected by the facial expressions and cues of the people you interact with. For example, if someone is smiling genuinely, you’re likely to “catch” that smile. But then there are smiles and then there are smiles. And grins produced by gin are a lot more fun to study. So the researchers split 720 healthy social drinkers into groups of three — with each one assigned either a vodka cocktail, a non-alcoholic drink, or a placebo drink (alcohol-free, but with vodka smeared inside the glass).

Let a smile be your umbrella, 'cuz it looks like it's gonna be raining something damn soon.

Let a smile be your umbrella, ‘cuz it looks like it’s gonna be raining something damn soon.

Each group was introduced and then served drinks at regular intervals to test how well strangers bonded socially. The scientists watched for genuine smiles, as opposed to the fake ones we all tend to flash in group settings (which were easy to weed out on camera). They also observed the groups to see how quickly those smiles jumped from one person to another. And the winners were those with wieners who’d had a drink or two.

It seems that quicker than crabs can spread from one person to another, when you get a group of men together and ply them with booze, they start smiling at each other like nuns eyeballing a cucumber. But only when only penis is in the room. When fish intrude those smiles disappear; mixed groups in the study did not trade smiles any more or less whether drunk or sober. ‘Cuz even when drunk there are somethings ya just don’t wanna get close to.

And who could resist a smile like that?

And who could resist a smile like that?

The researchers concluded that men have to raise their blood alcohol level to be social and friendly. And lead author of the study, PhD candidate Catharine Fairbairn, said that because men really do seem to enjoy social situations more as they consume more alcohol, these group settings might be where they develop their dangerous drinking habits. Methinks some angry fish was just pissed at how happy all those penis were without women around. And it’s not that men need to drink to be social and friendly with each other either, it’s just that after pounding a few back curious straight boys have that ‘Boy was I drunk last night!’ excuse to fall back on.

What the researchers missed was the fact that when the gods are smiling upon us and there are no fish in the room, guys are just as happy to be surrounded by nothing but dick and those smiles become highly contagious. As do their soon-to-follow erections. The University of Pittsburgh needs to do a follow up study where all participants are nude. ‘Cuz that room full of only men will set a new record for how quickly they all have a shit-eating grin on their faces. And that’s a study I’d be in favor of my tax money paying for.

'Cuz it's not only booze that'll put a smile on a guy's face.

‘Cuz it’s not only booze that’ll put a smile on a guy’s face.

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Sawatdee and welcome to the new and improved Bangkokbois Gay Thailand Blog! Okay, so it’s not necessarily improved, just hosted on a new site. And it’s not just about Thailand, though that still is the main focus. And it’s not all gay either, unless you’re not and then you’ll think it’s pretty damn gay I’m sure. All of the penis might tip you off. Which means if you are not of the required legal age to be looking at penis other than your own, you should leave. And go tell your parental units they suck at their job.

But it is a blog and one out of three ain’t bad. Besides, Bangkokbois Pretty Gay Mostly About Thailand Blog For People Of Legal Age is just too wordy. But so is Dancing With The Devil In The City Of Angels, which is really the title of this blog.

As cool of a title as that is, Google just ain’t sharp enough to figure out that means this blog is mostly about Thailand. And pretty damn gay to boot. The penis part even Google figured out. Which is a good thing. ‘Cuz Bangkokbois Pretty Gay Mostly About Thailand With Lots Of Penis Blog For People Of Legal Age, I think, was taken by someone else.

Move along, there’s nothing to see here folks; pay no attention to that man behind the curtain:

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