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Old hands and sexpats love nothing more than bitching about the high drinks cost at gogo bars on Soi Twilight. Okay, old hands and sexpats love to bitch period. But a perennial favorite is whining about how much that first drink at a Bangkok gogo bar costs. It’s around ten bucks these days. Which does sound pricey. Until you remember you are not just paying for a drink, you are paying for the treat of watching a bunch of naked dudes cavorting around the stage. Which the old hands and sexpats never seem capable of remembering. Or they wouldn’t whine so much. ‘Cuz getting to watch a bunch of naked guys do those things naked guys tend to do is priceless.
While none of those whiners actually knows what it cost to run a bar that offers hot and cold running boys in Bangkok, they will gladly tell you the exorbitant prices charged for drinks are because bar owners are greedy and care more about profits than they do about their customers. And predicting the downfall of those bars because of that greed is almost as enjoyable as bitching about how much they’re charging. Dreamboys – who tends to lead the price increase in each round – is often cited as an example of owner greed. Yet that bar has been going strong for years, with no sign its popularity is waning. Huh. So are gogo bar owners greedy bastards who deserve the bankruptcy surely headed their way? Or are they just astute businessmen who know what their product is worth?
Yup. Smells like science to me.
It turns out portraying gogo bar owners are uncaring capitalistic pigs is a disservice to the industry. ‘Cuz science says, just like the boys in their stables, bar owners’ real concern is about taking care of you. And considering what they have to work with, that ain’t no easy job. Finding boys to willingly strut their stuff on stage isn’t difficult. Enticing sex tourists into their establishment to drool over those boys isn’t much of a task either. But convincing the boys to spend a night going one-on-one with an ancient, gelatinously obese, smelly, myopic, bald, farang whose cynicism, anger and disillusionment are palpable can be a Herculean task. Unless you get them drunk first. And I don’t mean the boys.
No problemo. Researchers at the University of Bristol have just discovered what Bangkok’s gogo bar owners already knew to be true. Your attractiveness increases greatly after you’ve had a shot of your favorite liquor. In the study, published in the journal Alcohol and Alcoholism – which wouldn’t be a bad new catch phrase for Pattaya – 40 participants were photographed three times — sober, after one glass of wine, and after two glasses of wine. Then their photos were shown to a new group of people who were asked to rate their attractiveness in side-by-side comparisons. They were either shown a participant’s sober photo nest to his one-drink shot, or his sober photo against the two-drink shot.
Invariably, participants selected the photos of those who had downed a drink as being the most attractive the majority of the time. The researchers are not sure why, but suggest it could be due to pupil dilation – which is a positive trait to viewers – or muscle relation, or rosier cheeks. In any case the results are the same. “It suggests that people are rated as more attractive once they’ve consumed a small amount of alcohol,” said the study’s senior researcher, Marcus Munafò, a professor of biological psychology. “What it means is that alcohol is sort of hijacking that mechanism, or promoting the aspects of facial features that we regard as attractive for other reasons,” he says.
The conclusion of the study was that in addition to perceiving others as more attractive, a mildly intoxicated alcohol consumer may also be perceived as more attractive by others. Which in turn may play a role in the relationship between alcohol consumption and risky sexual behavior. “You consume a drink, so you see other people as more attractive,” Munafò said. “But you also become more attractive yourself because you’ve consumed a drink.” And that’s a win-win in anyone’s book.
That’s the good news. The bad news is that there is a limit to how attractive booze can make you. A quick glance in the mirror should clue you into that fact. ‘Cuz while study participants found a single shot upped the attractiveness level of drinkers, drink #2 made that rating head south. After two drinks, participants found their sober photos more attractive than the high-alcohol head shots. And that’s a sobering bit of news.
The researchers did not test the attractiveness of subjects who had drank more than two shots. ‘Cuz even scientists wouldn’t attempt to float the hypothesis that anyone finds a falling-down drunk attractive. Even one with a fat wallet. Or at last call.
So despite all those nasty things you’ve been saying about Bangkok’s gogo bar owners, the truth is they know their business, they know their boys, and they care about you. Demanding that you buy a drink – which is considered a cover charge everywhere else in the world – is ‘cuz they know it will help you appear just a bit more attractive to the boys. And by pricing their drinks high, they discourage you from drinking the amount that will allow the boys to remember just how disgusting you really are. That those prices add to their bottom line is just a happy coincidence. Because what they really care about is your happy ending.
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Mitch S. said:
“And the music is too loud!”
Bangkokbois said:
That’s so customers can’t hear those whimpering noises the boys make at the thought they’re gonna have to have sex with them.
Ricwilder said:
The off fee is too high. Hell it is more then Jabba used to tip the poor boy, who was unlucky enough to be offed by him. Just imagine having to have sex with that sorry queen, but don’t try to imagine it after you have eaten.
Bangkokbois said:
The high off fee is, again, about bar owners taking care of you. That helps empty your wallet so when that greedy bar boy asks for 500 baht taxi money you can honestly tell him you don’t have it.
(I’d answer the Jabba part of your comment but don’t think it is possible to use the word ‘honest’ and Jabba in the same reply.)
Anonymous said:
I’m looking to ask a question of everyone who contributes here, on a bummer of a subject – and ‘Taking Care of You’ may be as good a place as any to bring this up. I hope you welcome the exchange, Bangkokbois – you have one of the all-time great blogs going here.
So, the topic is, health and disease risks.
It’s remarkable how, on the one hand, if you look at any of the gay-health-related sites they always take for granted that ‘HIV and other STDs are very, very common in Thailand, especially amongst sex workers’ …
And yet on the other hand, this concern very rarely comes up in blogs like this, and so doesn’t seem too worrisome, at least not enough for it to be mentioned much at all.
And, as I have from time to time visited Soi Twilight and Bangkok’s gay massage places, I’m amazed at how healthy the boys seem to be, and although they are careful and conscientious in making sure condoms are always used, etc. etc., they don’t give the impression of being haunted by health worries as related to their profession.
You might assume that boys do get sick frequently, at which point they might exit the scene, but it’s hard to tell just how heavy a specter this is in their lives, or what percentage do eventually fall victim to HIV and other nasty stuff.
Do you have any insight into this question? I assume you may have a better window into this side of the boys’ lives, through Noom – I haven’t gotten close enough to any to feel comfortable asking them about it, but I wonder about this, as much out of concern for the boys as to protect myself.
And although I would never indulge in anal without using a condom, I do enjoy sometimes driving a boy crazy with one of my expert blowjobs (no condom, but never letting them cum in my mouth, either)… So far, I’ve never caught any bugs, and I trust that I’m not running a severe risk… but on the other hand, I wonder about whether I’m underestimating the dangers here.
What do you think? What’s your personal policy on these matters? And what insight do you have into this side of the boys’ lives? I wouldn’t be surprised if many of us are curious – and concerned – about all this.
Bangkokbois said:
Good question, although (as you probably suspect) the answer will be all over the place.
I’d assume anyone with half a brain would consider the importance of practicing safe sex anytime, but especially when dealing with guys whose partner numbers are astronomical thanks to their profession. At the same time, since a lot of guys only think with their little head, you can assume the precautions they should take often get forgotten. Or ignored. The safe sex folk like to remind you that you are not just having sex with the guy you’re bedding, but with every guy (or fish) he’s had sex with too. Which also means all those that person has bumped uglies with. And so on and so on and so on. It’s a six degrees of separation scenario that keeps me awake a night just thinking that some sexpat from Pattaya has boldly gone before me. So personally, a condom for me is a must. And if I could figure out how to still enjoy myself while wearing a hazmat suit, I’d be donning that gay apparel too.
Like their customers bar boys too go from 0% to 100% when it comes to playing safe. The bars do provide safe sex instruction. And there are several NGOs that try to educate the boys too. Years ago, bar owners provided a pack of condoms/lube to any boy that got offed. Then they started charging for them. Now, if he thinks about it, a boy may borrow one from a barmate. Depending on just what he thinks safe sex means.
One guy from Tawan I know always wears a condom. Period. Even if the customer is only going to blow him. And if a customer objects, too bad. Another I know asks where his customer is from ‘cuz he’s decided only men from Europe are risky sex partners. So he doesn’t suit up with Americans. There seems to be a belief that farang too are only the customers a boy has to worry about and they’ll go condomless for Asian customers. And you occasionally hear from a forum poster about being able to offer a larger tip for a bar boy to go bare. Which not only shows you the problem you are dealing with but just how disgustingly stupid some punters are.
I’ve had boys ask me, “You, okay?” and then indicate I need not wear a condom. Tempting? Sure it is. But why take the chance? ‘Cuz you know he believed his last customer too. You just never know what a guy has been exposed to. If there was any bar boy I’d trust it’d be Noom. He loves himself and his body far too much to place himself at risk. But there has never been any question about us using condoms. The one time the subject came up, he explained that he lubs me too much to not insist on protection. And every visit I make to Thailand I bring him a large supply of rubbers so that between trips he’ll never run out.
Westerners now have a variety of pharmaceuticals to use to deal with HIV and AIDS is no longer necessarily the death sentence it once was. So some, probably far too many, get sloppy about their safe sex practices. Unfortunately those same medical wonders are not readily available for most Thais; boys who sell their booty to make a living certainly can’t afford those treatments. I’d think that alone would be enough to convince punters to always practice safe sex – for the boy’s sake. But then I’m a dreamer. The opposite is probably more true.
Anonymous said:
Thanks for quite a thoughtful and nuanced answer, posted just 59 minutes after my submission!
In my experience, the boys I’ve been with have always been very scrupulous and careful, but who knows whether that has something to do with me being Caucasian… Very scary to think that they might not bother to be so careful with Asians.
For the boys’ sake, as well as the customers, we should all set the clearest possible example and always be proactive about using protection with absolute consistency.
Bangkokbois said:
Thanks – and yup, better safe than sorry is a good bit of advice to live by when living it up in the Land of Smiles!