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…dancing with the devil in the city of angels…

~ Ramblings, Rumblings and Travel Tales: Bangkok and Beyond

…dancing with the devil in the city of angels…

Monthly Archives: January 2015

End Of The Week #176

31 Saturday Jan 2015

Posted by Bangkokbois in End of the Week

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And More!, Nude Dudes

With the Super Bowl tomorrow, I thought today would be a good time for a little tight end.

With the Super Bowl tomorrow, I thought today would be a good time for a little tight end.

wide reciever I coulda gone with a wide receiver reference for today’s Nude Dude photo too, or any one of these other 17 Football Terms That Mean Something Different To Gay Guys.

footsies Or if ya just wanna fake a hand off, this gay Super Bowl commercial that you won’t see during tomorrow’s broadcast might help ya get a stiffy in or out of the locker room.

ouch On the other hand, if you end up enjoying the game tomorrow and decide to get in a huddle during half-time, here’s 9 Important Facts You Should Know About Breaking Your Penis. ‘Cuz accidents do happen.

handy bed partners What to Do When You Wake Up to Your Partner Masturbating Beside You? Um, take things into your own hands?

cuba libra Sine Obama is normalizing relations with Cuba and U.S. citizens will soon be free to legally visit, here’s a photographic peak at The Secret Homoerotic Lives Of Cuban Men you may find there.

Asian Man Addiktion I like this week’s NSFW Tumblr link, Asian Man Addiktion, for two reasons. It has something for everyone, twink to muscle god. And the theme provides lots of smaller pix on one page to browse through at once. Make that three: lots of naked Asian guys too. Or was that a given?

face paint It’s a bit longer and more detailed than necessary, but This Is What One Man Learned From Wearing Makeup For A Week should clue you in to why you may not want to get in touch with your feminine side.

Bedable

30 Friday Jan 2015

Posted by Bangkokbois in It's A Gay World

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That's Gay

Bedable 1

Last week Dave decided we needed to buy a new bed.

Huh.

An unexpected expenditure, but not one that would exactly break my budget. Or have any impact on my budget for that matter. But I did note that that ‘we’ is the same ‘we’ responsible when shopping in Bangkok with Noom. And since it was technically my bed we were talking about replacing, I didn’t think answering a few questions was out of line.

“Why.”

“‘Cuz I think we should have our own bed.”

“We do. It used to be my bed. Now it’s our bed.”

“Yeah, but that’s not the same thing.”

“It’s that wet spot thing, isn’t it?”

“Whaddaya mean?”

“Someone told you it really isn’t a gay rule that the bottom always sleeps on the wet spot, didn’t they?”

“You’re such a bastard.”

Bedable 2

Dave is still new to being gay. He figured out the basics pretty much on his own. Well, not entirely on his own. My dick played a supporting role. For the rest, he turns to me for instructions. Which provides me ample opportunity to devise an entire set of rules that all gay men live by. Rule #3, I think, just got tossed out the window. And no, ya don’t want to know what Rule #2 is.

“But that is partially the point.”

“What.”

“This is your bed. It’s got your entire sexual history on it.”

“What!? These are clean sheets!”

“That’s not what I mean.”

Whew. That was a close one. So maybe I’m not gonna have to buy a new dining room table too. I considered arguing that it wasn’t just my sexual history, that it was our sexual history too. ‘Cuz there certainly were numerous nights when I masturbated while fantasizing about doing him. Back before he decided he was gay. But some things are best left unsaid. I briefly contemplated the phrasing for a new gay rule that would result in keeping my bed too. But I’ve been doing the same for one about handcuffs. And ya really got to learn to pick your battles.

“So are we talking just a new mattress and box spring, or an entire bed. ‘Cuz there’s a reason I like my four poster bed, ya know.” (The trick to successfully establishing a new gay rule is to drop lots of hints leading up to it.)

“No, the frame is fine. But there’s a lot of new types of mattresses on the market these days.”

Bedable 3

Uh, oh. Waterbeds were once a new kind of mattress too. Fortunately they went the way of the dinosaur. Not quite quickly enough, but extinct now nonetheless. The bed industry keeps trying to invent a better mouse trap. What ever they come up with never catches on for long. There probably needs to be a gay rule about that. Or one about Dave watching too many television commercials.

I’m not proud of it – but I love my bed, and it’s entire sexual history – so in a last ditch effort I played to one of Dave’s not-strengths: his coming out process.

“Ya know if we’re shopping for a bed together, the salesclerk is gonna know you are gay.”

Pronouns, you’ll note, are often an important distinction in winning any debate. And that one made him weigh his needs. Maybe he remembered about the preponderance of gay men working in retail. Or maybe it was just pay-back for that wet spot thingy. In either case, my ploy didn’t work.

“That’s fine.”

“So you’re cool with me dry humping you in the middle of the showroom when we test a few out?”

Hey, never say die. It was my bed we were talking about. Or, from the look Dave shot my way, what used to be my bed. No problemo. But I wasn’t kidding about that dry humping thingy. Our new bed was gonna have its sexual history established a lot sooner than he’d thought.

Bedable 4

I’m not set in my ways. But I am set in my preferences when it comes to a bed. The mattress has to be soft. Not soft like your dick is before that little blue pill kicks in, soft like Ted Cruz’s dick got when he heard both Jeb Bush and Mitt Romney were making presidential runs. My bed – okay, our bed – is the closest thing to a vagina I get to these days. At least until I vote for Hillary in 2016. Or Marco Rubio. When you jump on it, it needs to engulf you. In a warm, womb-like embrace. So on top of the soft mattress there needs to be a down-feather mattress pad. And then a down-feather mattress. With another one on top of that. Think Princess and the Pea. But a non-vegetarian version of the tale. If Green Peace ever decides baby geese are in danger of becoming extinct, I’m gonna personally blow one of their fucking boats out of the water.

So obviously Dave should have know ‘our’ new bed was gonna look a lot like ‘my’ old bed. But we had to check out the new-fangled mattresses on the market first. He was fascinated by the Sleep Number ones that allow you to adjust each side to a different firmness. So I reminded him how badly I suck at math. And then asked the cute (and gay, big surprise) salesclerk just how firm he was talking about. Dave, wisely, cut that conversation short.

Memory foam sounds suspiciously sinister to me, but we had to look at those too. That one was close. Until I told him those wet spots served the same purpose and were all the memories he’d ever need. Besides, who wants a mattress with numerous, permanent large divots in it? They would sell more mattresses if they came up with one that erased all traces of everything you ever did on it. To wipe the slate clean, so to speak. For bedtime memories, we already have the iPhone camera.

There was one that electronically adjusted heights and angles too, separately for both sides. I think bed manufacturers are trying to take American back to Leave It To Beaver days when couples slept separately in twin beds. Dave didn’t seem serious about that one. But, just in case, I reminded him my preferred position on a bed is to stretch out diagonally across it.

“Yeah, we need to talk about that.”

Huh. I feel a new gay rule coming on.

Bedable 5

As if there was ever any other possible outcome, we ended up buying a bed that looked and felt just like my old one. But without the sexual history. So it smelled a bit fresher. And would probably stand up to a black-light test better too. He dealt with arranging to have it delivered while I got on-line and ordered the necessary dead baby geese accessories so they’d show up at our doorstep before the new bed did. Before Green Peace got involved. And it was almost a done deal. Until Dave suddenly remembered he’s now a gay man.

“Look! They have linen spray!”

Oh fuck me sweet Jesus. Home fragrances are for people who need to up their house cleaning efforts. They are marketed as products to add a wonderful scent to your home, but are really used to disguise the disgusting smells people have made that they don’t want to be reminded of. Obviously, potpourri was invented by the French. Probably by French folk who owned cats. As for bed sheets, if you want them to smell like a bountiful garden of summer flowers, try washing them a bit more often. Preferably in laundry detergent that the manufacturer is not trying to convince you smells like a tropical rain forest. Tropical rain forests smell like mold, decay, and the dead bloody carcases of small furry animals. And I’ve already covered that base with the dead baby geese feather mattress pad, mattresses, and duvet. The only thing your sheets should smell like is Tide. And the occasional wet spot.

“Lavender!”
(Spritz, spritz.)
“Doesn’t that smell wonderful!?”

Yeah. Because when I’m elbow deep in ass, the smell of grandma is really what I want permeating the air of my bedroom. Our bedroom. Whatevers. I just don’t get the fake smell home fragrance market. If you really need your house to smell like roses, stop at a florist and buy some. But I thought maybe my nose was missing something. So I Googled it. Ya know what the top selling home fragrance in 2014 was? Monkey Farts. I kid you not. Monkey Farts. I don’t even want to think about how they capture that scent. Or what kind of person would want their home to smell of them. Or what their home smelled like that made them think Monkey Farts was a better way to go.

It’s like when strawberry, bubblegum, and cherry flavored lipsticks were popular among the girls I dated back in high school. (Yeah, I’m that kind of gay.) I never got that point either. But would still have to wait patiently while my current skank applied a fresh coat before we could get down to it. So I asked once.

Bedable 6

“Baby, lipstick is about color. So why do you buy flavored brands?”

“‘Cuz then when we’re together I’ll taste like strawberries!”

“But Baby! My dick doesn’t have a sense of taste!”

Obviously. Or I wouldn’t be banging you. Ya know. ‘Cuz you don’t have a penis. (Yeah, I was that kind of straight too.)

The same holds true for flavored condoms. Unless your asshole has talents I don’t know about. What’s the point? Cleanliness is next to godliness. That’s all that matters. And I don’t need your douche smelling like a bowl of bing cherries either. The scent of a man is as close as I need to get to heaven. That natural muskiness beats anything the personal fragrance industry can ever come up with. If you must, a tiny hint of whatever over-priced cologne you just had to buy is fine. But that after-trail smell from some guys’ cologne – that unavoidable tidal wave of aroma that says his limited vocabulary doesn’t distinguish the difference between ‘lightly apply’ and ‘heavily douse’, that reeking, all pervasive stench that would make a coroner gag – does not make me want to do you. It makes me want to take you outside and hose you down. While I hold my breath. And I certainly don’t want my bed sheets smelling like that cheap, knock-off bottle of Chanel No. 5 that you bought instead either.

Why is it that the guys who complain the most about smokers in bars, claiming their filthy habit results in the complainer’s clothes smelling like cigarette smoke, are always the same guys who wear so much cologne that that nicotine never stood a chance in the first place? And why do they think that is such a righteous anti-smoking argument when anyone with an iota of personal hygiene sense would have that outfit laundered before he wore it again anyway? I suspect those are the same people responsible for Monkey Farts being the top selling home fragrance in 2014.

Bedable 7

“Come on dude! How about vanilla? You like vanilla.”

Yup, I do. As an ice cream flavor. That doesn’t mean I want to sleep with it. In fact, vanilla is the last thing I want associated with my bed. Or our bed. Which Dave should know by now. Maybe I need to work on that gay rule about handcuffs a bit quicker. In any case, if he’d been paying attention to the aroma from my bed’s sexual history, he’d know the scent I prefer is rice. With an occasional burrito thrown in. For the ambiance.

“How about Tropical Breeze? It smells like the islands.”

“Dude, you’re Hawaiian. You’re what smells like the islands to me. And I don’t need to drop $14.95 for that pleasure. I just need to bury my nose in your arm pit. Come to think of it . . . ”

Fresh from being dry humped on a mattress in the middle of the showroom floor, Dave quickly caught a whiff of where I was headed and decided to quit while he was ahead. He’d have to be happy with just the new bed. And as for that wet spot thingy, all things considered – all things being my comfort – I think I’ll try to convince him those are a symbol of our love. Literally. And he should be happy to wallow in them. Because he loves me. Otherwise, he can change the sheets on ‘our’ new bed while I’m in the shower lathering away the scent of our relationship.

Aloha Friday #49

30 Friday Jan 2015

Posted by Bangkokbois in Aloha Friday

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'Cuz the haoles in Hawaii are hot when leied too.

‘Cuz the haoles in Hawaii are hot when leied too.

You Can’t Beat Their Meat

29 Thursday Jan 2015

Posted by Bangkokbois in Tips

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Hotels and Restaurants

One of Bangkok's best treats is all the fresh meat you can find on its streets.

One of Bangkok’s best treats is all the fresh meat you can find on its streets.

There is a lot to love about Thailand, and a lot for visitors to be wary of too. Many get the two confused. Despite, for example, the fame of The Grand Palace Is Closed scam, a perennial favorite in Bangkok, visitors flock to the shoddy gem emporiums and cut-rate, guaranteed to last until the first dry-cleaning tailor shops that are the important part of your 25 baht, 3 Temple Tour that some kind local clued you into since your day at the palace came up trumps. Those same touri wouldn’t be caught dead eating food from a street cart, usually out of fear that doing so will wind up with them being dead.

Granted, the streets of Bangkok are not exactly what you would call hygienic. And even the more popular food carts often look even less so. Add in that the gods only know what in the hell that stuff they are cooking is, and a lot of visitors decide to give dining in the streets a pass. To their great loss. For me, when you say Thailand, one of the first pictures that enters my mind is that of aromatic meats sizzling on a grill, lovingly watched over by some local vendor in the dark of the night. And then my stomach starts growling, my mouth begins to water. And I haven’t even thought of the guys in the gogo bars yet.

Personally, I’m of the eat first ask what it is later school of street food cart dining. After your mouth is filled with wondrous tastes, that you just chowed down on pig neck doesn’t sound as bad as it should. And in some cases, it’s better to just not ask at all. Exactly what was stuffed inside that sausage casing is not something you really need to know. Even back home you’d never let your lips touch a hot dog if you really thought about what it was made of. What is safe to assume, however, is that if it looks like meat and is being barbequed over an open flame on the streets of Bangkok, it’s either pork or chicken. Thais have an obsession with pig and chicken. And yes, that does mean you’ll occasionally run across treats like grilled chicken feet, but that doesn’t mean that everything else that vendor sells too is parts of a pig or chicken that you’d discard instead of thinking about cooking back home. Even if you are from the south. Well, actually it probably does. But if you try it first, before you know what it is, you’ll probably agree that crispy grilled chicken anus is actually damn tasty. If a bit chewy.

There are a lot of exotic treats to dine on in Thailand, but much of what is available on the streets will be familiar to you too.

There are a lot of exotic treats to dine on in Thailand, but much of what is available on the streets will be familiar to you too.

Most street food carts specialize in a single dish. And there are some pretty extraordinary culinary treats served up on Bangkok’s street daily. For newbies, however, I generally prefer starting them off with barbeque; it at least looks like something they are familiar with. And at 10 – 20 baht per serving if they don’t like it, it’s no big loss. Spitting out what they just put in their mouth doesn’t happen often though. When it does, it usually means they picked the wrong cart or the wrong piece of meat. So here’s two tips: First, eat where the locals do. It’s not like anywhere you find a cart serving grilled meats that you won’t see another one just a few steps away. Some, especially in tourist areas, are geared to sell to the unsuspecting and use the cheapest meats they can buy. Locals can tell from just looking if a pork ball is heavy on pork or heavy on filling. So get in line behind those who know. Second, there is nothing wrong with you deciding which skewer of meat you want. In fact locals seldom allow the vendor to make that selection for them. And if the skewer you want looks like it has been off the grill for a while, just pick it up and place it back on the barbeque to reheat. No one will bat an eye.

Barbeque is also a good first timer’s choice for those worried about how sanitary the cooking facilities may be. There are no plates or cutlery to worry about being cleaned, and fire pretty well kills off harmful bacteria. And after an evening of eating grilled meats, their stomach won’t allow them to be quite as picky over hygienic standards when you move them up to full plates of food later. Generally the meat cooked at street food carts is fresh. At least it was that morning. Most vendors hit their neighborhood fresh market in the morning and only buy the amount of ingredients that they anticipate using in a given day. Street vendors don’t like to carry a lot of over-head; most cannot afford to so. Most carts work the morning, lunch, dinner, or late-night crowds too; few set up shop for the entire day. So usually whatever is being cooked was still fresh just before it hit the grill. As in killed that morning. Which you can’t say about the meat at your local Piggly Wiggly back home.

I’m a jump in with both feet, total immersion kinda guy and think the best intro to street cart dining is to find the most disgusting looking dish possible and start chowing down. ‘Cuz it’s all up hill from then on in. But you may find that idea a bit hard to swallow. Literally. So for now, let’s start with what clucks or oinks. Or did earlier that day until an axe rudely interrupted their conversation. We’ll wait for those things that stare back at you for your advanced street cart dining lessons.

Soi Twilight's gogo bars are not the only place in town you'll find a tasty line of balls on display.

Soi Twilight’s gogo bars are not the only place in town you’ll find a tasty line of balls on display.

Little chunks of chicken on bamboo skewers are an ubiquitous offering at Bangkok street food carts. It’s a good choice to start with ‘cuz its almost identifiable. And you’ll think it tastes like chicken. Thanks to its lovely, smoky duskiness from the charcoal, and the slightly sweet garlicky barbeque sauce, I think it tastes like a little slice of heaven in your mouth.

Possibly even more popular are pork balls, although there are two different versions offered on Bangkok’s streets. Both are delicious, and if you are traveling with urban lesbians who know little about balls and less about meat they’ll believe you when you tell them those are pig testicles. That just means more for you. Usually, if the vendor sells chicken skewers they’ll have pork balls on a skewer too. This version is called nam and it’s made from pork, garlic, chilies, salt, and sticky rice, all fermented and encased in pig skin. Slightly sour, nam is popular and widely available throughout the country, although there are many different types of nam and it is cooked in a number of different ways. For now, stick with the grilled skewered ball version, and try it at several different spots ‘cuz the secret often is in the vendor’s homemade barbeque sauce.

When those sumptuous little balls are hanging in pretty rows instead of pierced by bamboo skewers, you’re in for a real treat. Not to mention a salute to Joni Ernst’s farm days. Filled with a mixture of ground pork, spices, and glass noodles, these freshly made sausage balls are mouth-watering delicious. They’re made by pushing the filling into a sausage casing as deep as the first joint of the thumb and then tightly wrapped with a white string around the outside, which turns them into one-inch, bite-sized balls, formed together in a long line.

The entire strand of sausage balls is grilled over hot charcoal. For each individual order, the vendor cuts a length of sausage balls from the strand and then snips the balls apart. Which is where Joni Ernst’s favorite pastime comes into play. Yours is walking away with a bag full of sausages bites drizzled with a mildly spicy sweet chili sauce and a bamboo skewer to spear each delectable piece into your mouth as quickly as possible. Then repeat as necessary.

Thai fried chicken vendors will give the Colonel a well deserved bitch slap every time.

Thai fried chicken vendors will give the Colonel a well deserved bitch slap every time.

Street food cart dining can be an educamational experience too. A good lesson in how Thais perceive the world is the choice many make between a nice piece of freshly slaughtered and plucked chicken grilled over an open flame – that creates a lovely flavorful glaze over the meat, coating it in sweet saltiness – and a piece of two-month-old frozen chicken coated in a disgusting batter of odd, mysterious spices that even the manufacturer won’t cop to, that has been sitting under a heat lamp for an hour and costs ten times what that fresh piece of chicken does.

In my opinion, KFC is what the south inflicted on the rest of the country in revenge for losing the Civil War. To Thais, KFC is all about status. They’ll walk right past a freshly grilled chicken stand to line up for the pleasure of dropping their entire week’s food allowance to sup on The Colonel’s revenge. This is one time you should not follow that when in Rome do as the Romans do advice. ‘Cuz when a Thai is hungry and not just out to impress, he’ll go for the freshly barbequed chicken every time too.

If your pallet is a bit more refined, you can also find chicken skewers filled with perfectly roasted livers (tab gai), and chicken gizzards (guen) which are a bit more chewy but lots more flavorful. There’s nang gai (chicken skin) too which is zero meat and all skin, just in case your system is missing all that fat you are used to eating back home. Local street chefs will also take it a step further and serve you that which the chicken used to step up to the chopping block, but ordering chicken feet might still be a bit beyond your personal Ewwww level. And then the next thing ya know those bowls of crunchy grasshoppers might start looking good.

Forget about spotting a pair of golden arches, in Bangkok the real treat is found under a cloud of aromatic barbeque smoke.

Forget about spotting a pair of golden arches, in Bangkok the real treat is found under a cloud of aromatic barbeque smoke.

Ditto for kor moo yang, which is grilled pork neck. But this is one of those treats that you’ll love if you don’t know what it is you’re putting in your mouth. Often displayed as a piece of steak, usually the vendor will slice yours into tiny, thin pieces that can be dipped into the accompanying barbeque sauce. But it too can be extremely fatty. So feel free to dig through the pile and pick out those pieces that have the most meat on them.

Grilled pork (moo ping) is also a popular breakfast treat on Bangkok’s streets, and beats the hell out of a bowl of oatmeal. It’s worth getting out of bed early for. These bite-sized cuts of pork are marinated in a sauce of coconut milk, dark soy sauce, garlic, palm sugar, and oyster sauce, then grilled over fiery charcoals until the meat begins to caramelize. I don’t know why it is that you can only find this treat during the early morning hours, but stumble out of bed and look for the closest cloud of barbeque smoke . . . you’ll be glad you did.

Almost as tricky to find is what Thais have done to the Malaysian/Indonesian dish known as satay. In Thailand it goes moo, not because it’s beef instead of the traditional chicken, but because locally it’s known as moo satay. And it’s pork. Whatevers. It’s onolishess, and that’s all that matters.

Maybe it's the exhaust fumes, but nothing tastes as delicious as freshly barbequed meat served piping hot off the streets of Bangkok.

Maybe it’s the exhaust fumes, but nothing tastes as delicious as freshly barbequed meat served piping hot off the streets of Bangkok.

What makes pork satay even more special than other types of Thai barbequed meats is its curry marinade. It infuses an herbal aroma into the meat, as well as turning the pork the color of turmeric. Most satay sellers in Bangkok never put big chunks of meat on a skewer, but just tiny curls of the grilled pork instead. Which is perfect for dunking the pork in its rich peanut sauce before slipping the entire conglomeration into your mouth. And if that doesn’t put a big smile on your face, you probably should have headed for Burger King instead. Preferably one back home.

Take It Off Thursday #49

29 Thursday Jan 2015

Posted by Bangkokbois in Take It Off Thursday

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nude asian dude

Is Thailand A Gay Mecca?

28 Wednesday Jan 2015

Posted by Bangkokbois in Gay Thailand

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What is it that makes Thailand worthy of a pilgrimage by gay men?

What is it that makes Thailand worthy of a pilgrimage by gay men?

Gay travel sites like to tell you that Bangkok is the Gay Mecca of SE Asia, that in Thailand you’ll find a warm and friendly people who willingly embrace gay visitors and smother them in tolerance. That’s because most gay travel site writers don’t know dick about Thai culture. And when they finally get down to telling you why Thailand is such a gay Mecca – in their view – you have to start wondering if they know anything about dick too.

Recently many of those sites trumpeted the inclusion of transgendered people in the new Thai constitution. Even though that’s still just a rumor. The Good General is not yet finished writing that document. But supposedly when he does sign off on it, the T community will be recognized. Thailand will finally have a third gender. And gay rights enthusiasts around the world are thrilled. Of course if you asked anyone in Thailand they’d tell you that ladyboys have nothing to do with being gay. And just because the new constitution may recognize their existence, that doesn’t mean equality is part of the package. Same-sex marriage still appears to be off the table. As the third gender being legally able to marry either of the other two genders – depending on the appendages or past existence of appendages involved – is still rumored to be too.

Nonetheless, gay travel writers continue to sing the praises of Bangkok as the gay Mecca of SE Asia. Even though Singapore is much more cruisy, Vietnam is making more headway toward marriage equality, and Taipei is turning positively pink these days. They point toward the complete lack of homophobia toward gay visitors in Thailand as proof, when in reality that’s more about Thai apathy toward farang idiosyncrasies. And that pink dollars are readily exchangeable for baht too. Sure, few if any hotels in Thailand will bat an eye at a guest checking in with a same-sex partner. And yes, TAT has an entire campaign geared at luring gay visitors to Thailand’s shores. But then no Thai is ever gonna let who is doing who – or what – behind closed doors get in the way of making baht. The idea that at a bakery would refuse to bake a cake for a same-sex wedding would just make them laugh. But that doesn’t mean equality is just around the corner.

Silom Soi 4 is a bustling scene of gay pubs and clubs, but one tiny soi does not a gay Mecca make.

Silom Soi 4 is a bustling scene of gay pubs and clubs, but one tiny soi does not a gay Mecca make.

Part of the confusion of just where Thai society stands on gay equality is that there is a world of difference between how gay tourists are viewed and how gay Thais are treated within that society. What appears to the casual visitor to be a happy free-for-all where every gender preference is cool ain’t quite as tolerant when it comes to being a gay Thai in Thailand. The gay travel writer view that Thailand is a hotbed of tolerance just ain’t true. At least not once you step outside of the gay ghetto visitors are familiar with. And even within those pink walls, just what, and who, qualifies as gay is not necessairly the same as you may think it is. Sure there are a few pubs and clubs catering to gay visitors in and around Silom Soi 4, but one small soi doesn’t a gay Mecca make. And for many in the gay travel industry, that’s where the Thailand gay experience begins and ends.

It’s all good and well to finish off your day at Telephone for some gay camaraderie and DJ Station for a chance at hooking up with a local lad, but everything else those sites suggest to gay tourists have nada to do with being gay. And sorry, a visit to one of the city’s ladyboy cabarets doesn’t count. Those are not geared toward family, but to breeders who want to gawk at the boys being girls.

Thailand is amazing. It holds many wondrous sites for tourists to enjoy. Everyone should see The Grand Palace (or try to). Everyone should check out Wat Pho, dine on the streets of Bangkok, shop ’til you drop, and then get a foot massage. There are more things to do and see in Bangkok alone than most visitor’s time in the country allows for. Gay visitors should visit Jim Thompson’s House of Silk for Sale, because rumor has it that Jimmy was gay. And because by Day #5 of their visit gay tourists are gonna be wondering where in the hell all the gay rainbows they were promised are.

Like moths to a flame, with good reason gay visitors flock to Thailand. And that has nothing to do with The Grand Palace.

Like moths to a flame, with good reason gay visitors flock to Thailand. And that has nothing to do with The Grand Palace.

When those who try to make a living out of the gay travel industry visit the kingdom they end up doing the exact same things that straight tourists do. They ride an elephant. Stay at a posh hotel (which is always billed as being ‘gay-friendly’ as though not every hotel in Thailand is). Dine at a four or five star restaurant where they can take in a four or three star view of Bangkok. And then spend a few hours on Soi 4 ‘cuz when you are gay and visiting the gay Mecca of SE Asia, you’d better find something pink to do. They may even brave the wilds of Patpong, Bangkok’s red light district. Where you need to step lively to avoid being run over by a stroller being pushed in front of a farang family and its gaggle of kids who also decided to take in the seamy-side of the Big Mango. And if they’re truly going balls to the walls, they may give a small nod to Soi Twilight, which is either portrayed as place no self-respecting gay man would ever actually visit, or as the home to a few small clubs that offer usually uniedntified but ‘risque’ nonetheless entertainment.

And there’s the rub. As it is at numerous happy ending massage shops spread around the city that cater to the gay male. Because what makes Thailand a gay Mecca is not a small soi of pubs, or a total indifference toward same sex hotel occupants, or that you can barely step outside of your hotel without stumbling over a ladyboy. What makes Thailand a gay Mecca is that any gay man can get laid there. By anyone and anything at anytime. What draws repeat gay visitors to Thailand is the happy endings they experienced before. What lures gay visitors to Thailand are the gogo clubs where they can watch boys being boys with other boys while wearing little to nothing. And then being able to pick out their favorite performer and take him back to their hotel for a more intimate performance. Bangkok doesn’t hold a gay pride parade. But nightly, there is a parade of smiling gay visitors making their way down the streets of Patpong, headed for a night of heaven.

Rule #1 of Madison Avenue is that sex sells. And there are few places on earth where you’ll find more sex for sale than in Thailand. But it’s an open secret that no one in the gay travel industry wants to talk about. ‘Sex tourist’ still invokes an image of a degenerate, elderly farang preying on the youth of a third world country. When anyone who’s spent a night on Soi Twilight knows that those guys may be on the prowl, but they are also the prey. The customer base of Bangkok’s bars has changed over the years; it’s now a younger, much less white crowd. Yesterday’s sex tourist has been replaced by today’s gay tourist. Who may, or may not, decide to indulge in a bit of commercialized sex while in town. It’s time for that which Thailand has always been known for – prostitution – to come out of the closet. Because that’s the country’s real claim to fame when it comes to being a gay Mecca.

Sex sells, and nowhere is more of it sold than in Thailand.

Sex sells, and nowhere is more of it sold than in Thailand.

The naughty shows have been toned down recently. And then bloomed back into full on fuck fests. But the less in-your-face variety of show is where the bars are headed. Hell, you can hardly find a ping pong ball in Patpong these days. And Patpong itself is featured in every guidebook and on every travel site as a nighttime shopping destination with a slightly risque side where you can buy the latest in over-priced knock-off goods. Or take in a show featuring Pussy Blow Candle. The locals have never hidden those places. And all the neon screaming Boys! in every color of the rainbow should clue you in that the sexy shows of Soi Twilight are not being hidden either. Thais have a less-than-prurient attitude towards sex. Or at least toward illicit sex. And just because it’s two penises involved – or more – doesn’t mean a thing. It’s a healthy attitude towards sex. And it’s that tolerance that sets Thailand apart as a gay Mecca. If only the gay travel industry would embrace the locals’ attitude.

TAT hired a New York based travel agency to design its campaign – Go Thai, Be Free – to encourage more gay visitors to come to the kingdom. That’s why there are so many rainbows displayed in the campaign’s literature and so few hot, young, strapping local lads reminding you of why Thailand is known as The Land of Smiles. That’s why listed hotels have nothing to do with a gay clientele. And why the cost of a night with a moneyboy is never mentioned. That campaign has nothing to do with the Thai openness about its commercial sex scene, and everything to do with the puritanical attitude toward prostitution that permeates America. ‘Cuz in the USA there is no room in gay pride for paid-for sexual encounters.

Not every gay tourist who visits Thailand wants to find the moneyboy of his dreams. Thailand is an affordable, exotic, foreign destination worthy of any tourist’s time. But that’s about being a tourist, not about being gay. Sex is not part of every tourist’s holiday plans. Not even every gay tourist’s. But when it is not, an occasional rainbow flag fluttering in the breeze has little to no impact on his stay. And we tend to avoid visiting those destinations where they behead boys who like boys anyway. If you are going to bill Thailand as a gay Mecca, there has to be something to set it aside from every other somewhat tolerant, somewhat inclusive, somewhat accepting destination. Or else everyone can just visit Miami Beach instead.

When you're in Bangkok you may well want to Go Thai. But he'll seldom Be Free.

When you’re in Bangkok you may well want to Go Thai. But he’ll seldom Be Free.

Thailand is a gay Mecca, but only when you quit trying to hide its naughty nighttime entertainment offerings. By doing so, you only further the notion that the country’s commercial sex scene is as repressed as it would be in your home country, which is the farthest thing from the truth. Thailand is accepting and tolerant of its gay visitors, but not because Thai society embraces gay equality. Because it does not. What it does accept is that gay boys will be gay boys and gay visitors are free to act as gay as they want to. Even when that means money is involved. Or especially when that means money is involved. Because in the end, a country’s tourism industry thrives on the money it brings in. Not on the brand of sexuality that accompanies that money.

Hump Day Is Bump Day #49

28 Wednesday Jan 2015

Posted by Bangkokbois in Hump Day Is Bump Day

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Hump Day Is Bump Day #49

Photo Of The Week #12

28 Wednesday Jan 2015

Posted by Bangkokbois in Photo Of The Week

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Photo Of The Week  #12

I knew there was a good reason why I never took up golf. And since the sport was invented by the Scotts, that pretty well makes the question of what they wear under their kilts a moot point too. Not to mention why they didn’t vote to get out from under Britain’s thumb when they had the chance to last year too.

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Sawatdee and welcome to the new and improved Bangkokbois Gay Thailand Blog! Okay, so it’s not necessarily improved, just hosted on a new site. And it’s not just about Thailand, though that still is the main focus. And it’s not all gay either, unless you’re not and then you’ll think it’s pretty damn gay I’m sure. All of the penis might tip you off. Which means if you are not of the required legal age to be looking at penis other than your own, you should leave. And go tell your parental units they suck at their job.

But it is a blog and one out of three ain’t bad. Besides, Bangkokbois Pretty Gay Mostly About Thailand Blog For People Of Legal Age is just too wordy. But so is Dancing With The Devil In The City Of Angels, which is really the title of this blog.

As cool of a title as that is, Google just ain’t sharp enough to figure out that means this blog is mostly about Thailand. And pretty damn gay to boot. The penis part even Google figured out. Which is a good thing. ‘Cuz Bangkokbois Pretty Gay Mostly About Thailand With Lots Of Penis Blog For People Of Legal Age, I think, was taken by someone else.

Move along, there’s nothing to see here folks; pay no attention to that man behind the curtain:

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