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Monthly Archives: February 2014

Seven Shots (Of Reality): Pride Is Not A Four Letter Word

28 Friday Feb 2014

Posted by Bangkokbois in The World of Thailand's Gay Gogo Bars

≈ 9 Comments

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Gay Thailand, Gay Thailand Forums

Welcome to Sunee Plaza. Bitch.

Welcome to Sunee Plaza. Bitch.

I’m not sure if I posted all seven of my 7 Shots (Of Reality) articles, I lost count. If not, this should finish that series off. If so, consider this one a bonus, a well-needed bitch slap that I’d have otherwise never considered had it not been for a recent post – and the follow-through enabler posts – from Jabba The Butt’s band of merry men. This series of articles was intended as a primer for newbies on how to avoid self-inflicted problems when dealing with Thai moneyboys (aka your ‘boyfriend’). And was meant to help the rest of us avoid hearing you whine about the moneyboy who done you wrong when you fail at that task. From years of reading the message boards I thought I’d heard it all. So I thought I’d covered the subject fully in my pervious posts. Silly me.

In case you missed it (and congratulations for that) let me paraphrase the event responsible for today’s post. A Pattaya sexpat (big surprise there) is off to the bank with his ‘boy special’ to withdraw more funds for the boy, who is never happy with the amount the farang gives him on a regular schedule. The boy, in a huff, walks off along the way. The farang, of course, still heads for the bank where he sits patiently, waiting for his true love to show up to collect his moola.

The boy finally arrives, either in a state of panic or dismay – the farang offers up both scenarios in his telling of the tale. And then bitch slaps the farang. The farang takes that public humiliation in stride, withdraws the money, gives it to his boy, and the two head back to the farang’s loom. The farang thinks their relationship may be over. And it’s “very sad’ as he puts it.

Uh, yes. You are.

Love may be blind. But even the blind understand dignity and pride.

Love may be blind. But even the blind understand dignity and pride.

Cue numerous posts of sympathy filled with an assortment of finger pointing to blame the incident on the boy because he (take your pick) a) is in the process of becoming a ladyboy and we all know how destructive those hormone treatments can be; b) is probably a yaba addict, and we all know how destructive that drug can be; c) is following relationship advice from his gang of ladyboy friends, and we all know how destructive a wild pack of ladyboys can be; d) is probably a redux addict, and though none of us know what in the hell that is, we are sure it is undoubtedly destructive; e) is probably both a yaba addict and has been gobbling down hormone pills – which has got to be both destructive and filling; or f) all of the above, but regardless it’s all his fault, time to move on, and good luck with your next boy special ‘cuz I’m sure that relationship will turn out much better for you.

Ann Landers must be rolling over in her grave.

Not that the poor farang didn’t learn from his mistake. He’s going to avoid fem boys in the future because he really doesn’t like ladyboys anyway. Yup. That should do it.

I can’t disagree with the farang’s decision to avoid fem boys and ladyboy in the future, though I’d add avoiding Sunee Plaza might be a helpful idea too. Though my initial suggestion would be for him to avoid going out in public period. Allowing a little local princess to bitch slap you in public makes farangs look bad. But at least it happened in Pattaya where the bar for farang reputations has already been set at its minimum level. Still: WTF? You allowed a prostitute to bitch slap you? In public? And then paid him for that honor? And the problem is with the boy? Really? Good god man, even Aretha Franklin knew how to spell respect.

Been bitch slapped by a moneyboy? No reason to cry over spilt milk, there’s more fish in the sea. Yeah, yeah, that’s the answer.

Been bitch slapped by a moneyboy? No reason to cry over spilt milk, there’s more fish in the sea. Yeah, yeah, that’s the answer.

Even though the farang told his tale looking for sympathy, since my use of it is as a cautionary one, and even though joining the rank of flying farang would appear to be the obvious answer, let’s rewind and look at what, perhaps, may have been a better path.

First, the farang was rather proud that he let his passive/aggressive side rule the day and didn’t tell his boy special they were headed to the bank, even though they’d been arguing for days about how little the farang had been paying his true love. Not that the boy didn’t easily figure than one out. I could argue that a relationship that is based on money isn’t one, but won’t because these relationships often are. Instead, how about a little communication. Like a mature adult might engage in. If your boy ain’t happy with how much money he’s getting out of you, a discussion of why you’ve arrived at that amount, and why he thinks he deserve more, is in order. At least it is if you are going to pretend you are in a relationship rather than paying a prostitute his due. And if the two of you cannot reach an agrement, then do not pass go. And don’t head to your bank to withdraw money he’s not gonna be happy with anyway.

If your beloved storm off in a huff on your way to withdrawing money for him over what a cheap bastard you are, go home. Lock the door. And when he finally shows up again, tell him to leave and to not come back until he can act like a human being instead of the screeching little queen he’s using your money to become. And while he’s gone, ask yourself why you are still in a relationship with a guy who is intent on no longer being one if you don’t like ladyboys in the first place.

Thai guys are not the puzzle some like to think they are. Pride, respect, and dignity are concepts that transcend international borders.

Thai guys are not the puzzle some like to think they are. Pride, respect, and dignity are concepts that transcend international borders.

When the prostitute you’ve been paying to pretend he loves you bitch slaps you in public, immediately stand up and kick him in the balls to remind him that despite his hormone treatments he still has a pair. And that you do too. I know, but pretend. Or if you honestly believe that physical violence is not in fact sometimes the best answer, call the police and pay them to arrest him for assault. Oh, and if you then “ think it is over between us,” congratulate yourself for having finally allowing a bit of reality to shine into your life.

If you then disregard any attempt at salvaging your pride and dignity by telling others about the time a ladyboy bitch slapped you in front of a room full of locals whom you do business with by posting it on a public message board, bitch slap anyone who offers you sympathy. Because they deserve it as much as you did. And then go bitch slap whoever raised you for not teaching you about self-respect too.

I’m not sure which is worse, the farang who not only allowed himself to be so entirely humiliated by allowing a moneyboy to slap him, or the idiots who empathize with him, suggesting all he needs to do is find a new boy special as though the problem is with the boy and not the farang – who undoubtedly has many more bitch slaps to enjoy in his future. For the former, the physical assault alone should have been enough, but then that obviously was the final blow, if you will. Everything leading up to that slap tells you the farang was already used to emotional abuse. So that line was easy for the boy to cross. Obviously the boy had no respect for that farang. Zip. Nada. Zero. None. He’s probably lucky all he got was a humiliating slap. So far. But I wouldn’t count on that “relationship” being over.

Jabba The Butt uses his iron glove to ensure his band of merry men’s fantasy world is never rocked by reality. Shame that.

Jabba The Butt uses his iron glove to ensure his band of merry men’s fantasy world is never rocked by reality. Shame that.

As for those who offered their sympathy and encouragement in finding a new boy to abuse him instead of the psychological help he so desperately needs, y’all should be ashamed of yourselves. Seriously.

The glue that has bound this series of posts together has been that rather than pointing fingers at the boy who done you wrong, you need to first look at yourself and your contribution to that disastrous affair. Invariably, the farang who has been taken advantage of by a moneyboy allowed it. Or asked for it. You can blame being in love, or being in lust, or dealing with a culture vastly different than yours, or being too nice of a guy, or female hormone treatments, or yaba, or any of the other excuses farang have come up with, but the simple truth is when you allow someone to walk all over you – emotionally or financially, or both – and bitch slap you along the way – literally or figuratively – you only have yourself to blame. That’s about something that is wrong within you, not about something that is missing in the boy you chose to abuse you.

Face, as a concept, has been much debated on the message boards. I could never figure out why because it is fairly basic. But now I know. It’s because it is a foreign concept to so many farang. At its basic level, face is about pride and respect. For yourself and towards others. The tricky part, evidently for some, is the idea that when you have no pride, when your actions tell a Thai that you are not worthy of respect, you have no face. And will get treated accordingly.

Welcome to the world you’ve created for yourself.

Welcome to the world you’ve created for yourself.

When your boy special treats you like a walking ATM it’s not because he’ a greedy little whore. Well, okay, he is. But even if that is what resides in his black little soul, he would never act on those impulses if he respected you. Doing so goes against his nature, his culture, and how he was raised. If you’ve proven you are unworthy of his respect, however, all bets are off. And you then deserve to be fleeced for every satang he can get out of you.

The farang who related this tale said that he “thought Thais were not into dramatic scenes.” Uh, hello? Bitch slapping your walking atm is not about drama. It’s about scorn. And having no respect for you. It’s about your complete lack of pride. It’s not about the hormones he’s taking. Or the yaba. It’s about you. Not him. And as for “all the other fish in the sea” your fellow posters think you should move on to, do you really think every moneyboy in Sunee hasn’t already heard about you? Or that by some miracle they will treat you any differently?

Pride is not a four letter word. Even in Pattaya. And even in Pattaya, being a farang means your social status starts off at a higher level than that of most of the locals with whom you will come into contact (your fellow farang, not so much). Until you prove otherwise. Perhaps your self-image don’t include concepts such as pride, respect, dignity, honor, and self-esteem. But that’s the stuff that Thais use to determine how they should treat you. Whether it is a vendor on the street, a tuk tuk driver, one of the boys in brown, or the boy you decide to fall in lust or in love with, your actions will be their clue as to the amount of respect to be shown. And when you show them how little pride means to you, you deserve the bitch slap coming your way.

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Aloha Friday #3

28 Friday Feb 2014

Posted by Bangkokbois in Aloha Friday

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Nude Dudes

nude hunk

I so want to hump those armpits.

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Eye Candy: Give Me An O

27 Thursday Feb 2014

Posted by Bangkokbois in Eye Candy

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Nude Dudes

Proof that there is a god:  Bernardo Velasco.

Proof that there is a god: Bernardo Velasco.

With Rio turning into a hotbed of male flesh tomorrow as the annual carnival festivities kick off, I thought an eye candy post of what makes Brazil a gay man’s wet dream come to life might be in order. Which is not a difficult assignment. There are so many hot Brazilian guys it’s more difficult in picking out which to feature. Originally I was going to go with a photo of each of a half a dozen or so different hotties. But as dreamy as each of them was, I kept going back to photos of Bernardo Velasco, a male model I’ve been drooling over for several years. And just selecting a single picture of him to use proved to be an impossible feat.

BV 2

No problemo. The 2016 Olympics will be held in Rio and I can post those other stud’s photos then. Huh. Usually bringing the world’s fittest men to town for the Olympic Games pushes that city’s hotness index sky high. When the male Olympians hit Rio, they’re hardly gonna make a blip on the radar. There will be, however, a lot of very happy Olympic divers.

BV 3

I can’t imagine having sexual fantasies about someone named Bernard. Or Bernie. (And yes, I really am that shallow.) But add an O and those Os start gushing forth. Though even Bernardo might have been off my list of doable guys if not for having run across Velasco back when he posed for The Boy. It’ no surprise that Bernardo’s career as a model continues to flourish; as he has matured he has grown to look even more dreamy. Which makes picking out only a handful of photos of him that much more difficult. Since he has not done many fully nude shots, what then do you go with? The frequent shirtless or in a swimsuit or underwear photos that show off his killer body? Or those that show off his killer smile? The problem is Bernardo is the whole package. Even when he’s not showing off his package.

BV 4

Fortunately, I’ve posted photo of him before. And really need to more often. Fortunately there are many clothing line manufacturers who’ve come out with a particularly ugly line of swimwear or underwear who know they can save their investment by having Bernardo model their clothing for them. I’m just hoping someone who sells jocks will hire him soon. Or a G-string manufacturer would be even better. Though I’d buy a burlap sack if this guy came in it.

BV 5

The 5’ 10” 27-year-old, who has graced the cover of Men’s Health and DNA, originally modeled under the name of Elian Gallardo though his real name is Bernardo Velasco Gonçalves. He won the title of Mister Brazil in 2009 and has a degree in Physical Education from Rio de Janeiro Federal University, which I assume all he had to do to earn was to take his shirt off. I’m surprised they didn’t give him a doctorate. He says he eats everything and loves pasta and other carbs. And still I don’t hate him.

BV 6

Most recently, Velasco’s gone blonde. And looks like a Ken doll. A very hot Ken doll. I think it was for a Brazilian television show he landed a small part on, so maybe he’ll go back to his natural dark look. Since I’m already over-loading this post with his photos, I’m not including any of those. Besides, he is my fantasy guy, not yours.

BV 7

I didn’t really need to go surfing the internet for more photo of Bernardo, but then there’s never a good excuse to not surf the internet for photos of hot guys. And it’s been a while since I Googled him, so ya never know maybe he finally did that G-string layout I’ve been dreaming about. Nope. But I did find a rather massive post of photos of Bernardo being his usual adorable self. And better yet, there’s a video of him playing with his adorable self too. Buck as naked, hard, and pleasuring himself for your pleasure. That post and video is here. If you just want to skip to the good stuff, click on the last photo of this post to watch what he does with that hand.

BV 8

BV 9

BV 10

BV 11

BV 12

BV 13

BV 14

BV 15

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Take It Off Thursday #3

27 Thursday Feb 2014

Posted by Bangkokbois in Take It Off Thursday

≈ 2 Comments

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take it off thursday #3

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Sex In The Locker Room: A Not So Straight Man’s Fantasy

26 Wednesday Feb 2014

Posted by Bangkokbois in It's A Gay World

≈ 4 Comments

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That's Gay

naked in locker room 1

My worst on-line hook-up date was with a hot Filipino mixed hunk back in Hawaii who decided we should meet in person at his local gym for a game of handball (oh, grow up!). Handball is not one of the world’s most popular sports (I’m not gonna be able to get through this tale if you keep giggling, so stop it!). I’ve played since I was a young pre-teen and just finding someone to play with was enough to give me a chub. That he turned out to be cute with a dreamy smile was an added bonus. So of course, being a guy, I trounced his ass, showing him no mercy.

Not having the patience for being devious myself, I seldom recognize it in others. David, as it turned out his name was (why do gay guys always use the formal version of their name?), admitted to his scheme after the fact. And after we’d finished not only the game but a mutually enjoyable orgasm several hours later. Being quite picky about the bodies he shared his with, and this being before the days when selfies were the norm, he invited all of his first-time potential sexual partners to the gym so that afterwards he could check out their entire offerings in the locker room. It turned out, even though his testosterone kicked in once we started playing and he did his best to not lose, his real goal was the free show in the showers. Sneaky little bastard.

Despite the joy of yet another win notched in my belt, what neither of us could ignore was that the primary purpose of our meeting that afternoon was to put another notch in our respective bedposts. The amount of time I spent checking out his ass during our game alone should have thrown the win to his side of the court. But then he spent a lot of that time with his eyes glued to my crotch instead of the ball too. I don’t know if the final check in the locker room was even necessary, but a shower was. And by the time we stripped down to the buff, it was cold showers that were the necessity.

naked in locker room 2

Which is why I say that was my worst on-line hook-up date. Getting a chub in a men’s locker room is not considered appropriate behavior. With sexual tensions at their highest peek, and getting a long peak at the body you plan on ravishing as soon as the two of you can find a private place to do so, not getting a bit hard is almost impossible. On the plus side, David became a regular fuck buddy and handball partner. But the difficulty in trying to act as though his naked body during our locker room experience was of little interest to me is something that has stuck in my memories.

I only mention this because of the current, rather silly, debate about professional athletes in America who decide to come out and live their live as openly gay men. Some idiot is even lobbying congress to pass a law banning gay players from the NFL. Like our current congress is capable of actually passing any legislation these days. What once was a hypothetical, has become reality with Jason Collins – an NBA player who came out after being let go by the Washington Wizards – having just been signed to the Brooklyn Nets, making him the first openly gay professional league player.

Interestingly, even though Jason has so far only been signed to a 10 day contract, there has been an unprecedented demand by fans who want to buy an official copy of his jersey – he’s picked 98 as his number in honor of Matthew Shepard who was murdered for being gay back in 1998. But that’s not the story. The reaction to his and NFL hopeful Michael Sam’s homosexuality in the locker room is.

naked in locker room 3

I’ve always liked Charles Barkley. Charles, throughout his career both in the NBA and as a commentator, has always allowed his mouth to get out in front of his brain. And he gets away with it because everyone likes him. Recently he ripped on King’s shooting guard Ben McLemore for having nappy hair; Charles is probably the only man in America who could get away with that. But in an interview with CNN’s Wolf Blitzer, discussing how gay athletes will be received in the locker room, Charles said, “I think it’s an insult to gay people to think that they’re gonna be looking at their teammates in a sexual way.”

Um, sorry Charles, you got that one wrong. That’s not an insult. Because gay men do check out other guys’ junk in the locker room. And it is in a sexual way.

Chuck meant well. And the number of other professional athletes who’ve weighed in on the subject saying they are in favor of their gay team mates being open about their sexual preferences is encouraging too. But those comments, invariably, come down to the ‘naked with a gay man in the locker room’ question. And the fear that some queer is gonna be checking out your junk. As though straight guys don’t. Sure, the breeders may not be spinning sexual fantasies in their heads, at least not often. But everyone looks. And not just at your crotch either. A nice ass is a nice ass no matter who it’s hanging off.

naked in locker room 4

Jonathan Vilma, a linebacker for the New Orleans Saints, recently expressed his concerns, while making sure to let everyone know he’s not a homophobe. “Imagine if he’s the guy next to me, and you know, I get dressed, naked, taking a shower, the whole nine, and it just so happens he looks at me,” he said during an interview with NFL Network’s Andrea Kramer. “How am I supposed to respond?”

First Jonathan, you may or not be homophobic, but you may want to consider why it is you are imagining being ogled by another man. And as for your response, it sounds like you might get a raging hard-on. Which, I’m sure, would be just fine with your gay team mate. Self discovery is a wonderful thing.

Vilma, of course, got slammed by the press for his comments. Because the politically correct answer is that gay or straight it really shouldn’t matter who your team mates prefer doing. But that’s the problem with being politically correct. You ignore what are real concerns. When those concerns should be more fully delved into. And I think Vilma hit one of the problems with gay professional athletes in the locker room squarely on the nose. The problem, or worry, isn’t with the gay player. Because seriously, it’s not like just because he’s out he’s suddenly gonna be grabbing dick in the showers. The worry is about how a supposedly straight player’s body and mind may respond to being naked with a man whom he knows likes dick. The worry isn’t that the other guy is gay, but that possibly you just might be a little gay too.

naked in locker room 5

Straight men get naked with a room full of their buddies in locker rooms every day. It is not sexual to them, the scent of sex never enters their mind. They may look, they may note who’s a shorty and who puts them to shame. But thoughts of sex just are not part of that enjoyable picture. Even when they know one of those naked guys happens to be gay. When your thoughts turn to a sexual nature, whether you want to blame it on having a gay guy in the locker room with you or not . . . well, me thinks the lady doth protest too much. Unless it’s Tom Daley that you’re naked in the locker room with. ‘Cuz that would be understandable.

Homophobia, by it’s very definition, is about fear. Homophobia in the men’s locker room isn’t about the fear over what a gay team mate might do, but rather it’s a fear about what you – as possibly not as straight as you thought you were – might do. Do gay guys check out the other men in a locker room? Hello! See, there is such a thing as a stupid question. Does that mean he’s gonna lose control and suddenly sexually assault you? Not without an invitation. But I can tell you, if you’re hot enough and that gay guy notices your eyes are lingering just as much on him as his are on you, there’s a good chance he might invite you out for a cup of coffee, or a game of handball, later.

Jason Collins may be the first openly gay professional league athlete, but he’s not the first gay man to play professional sports. There have always been gay players in the locker rooms. Which is why this debate is so silly. An out athlete is not going to be any different in the showers than a closeted one. Or a straight one for that matter. He’s on the team to play ball, not to play with your balls. He’s on the team and pulling down a multi-million dollar salary because of his talents on the field, not because of how talented he may be between the sheets. And if all you can think of is gay sex when you look at him, that’s not his problem. It’s yours. But then Nike, Adidas, and other sporting equipment manufacturers are actively signing endorsement deals with openly gay athlete these days. So maybe that’ll work out well for you after all.

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Hump Day Is Bump Day #3

26 Wednesday Feb 2014

Posted by Bangkokbois in Hump Day Is Bump Day

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nude asian dude

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Blow Me

25 Tuesday Feb 2014

Posted by Bangkokbois in Blogs

≈ 33 Comments

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Blogs

blow me

2,000+ posts, 10,000+ pix, and 9,000+ comments later, this week marks the anniversary of a decision I made on a lark three years ago to become a blogger. Having already added the title of sex tourist to my belt, that seemed the only available step down left to me. The nice thing is, when you set the bar low enough, it’s easy to succeed.

It’s been a tumultuous year for Thailand. And for the gay Thailand message boards too. You’d think there’d be a connection there, but the country is still spinning along its merry path, even if to the outside it looks to be quite wobbly. Not so the forums. Regardless of the view, wobbly is a compliment these days. Two have folded, leaving three, and none of those is exactly what you could call healthy. Why? I have my own conclusion on that subject but I’ll save them for another day and another post. Because it’ my blog’s birthday and this post is supposed to be all about me. (We’ll just pretend this entire blog isn’t out of respect for the joyous occasion.)

But no man is an island – Boo Hoo’s blog too seems to have finally faded away into an oblivion of its own creation, without anyone noticing, and someone has to pick up the slack for over-using hackneyed cliches – and the sorry state of affairs on the forums does impact this blog. There are just not that many characters left to poke fun at. Which has always been a staple of this blog since its inception. Shame that. But at least I’ll always have homophobes to ridicule.

So expect less character assassination stemming from the message boards in the upcoming year. Unfortunately, for the large part, those left actively posting have no character worth assassinating. Undoubtedly there will be other change too. Though I can’t tell you what they are because this endeavor has never been a well-thought out one. There will be a few in format, I’m still tinkering so I’m not sure if that’ll be in a week or two or some where off in the distant future. And the gods only know what other little things my devious mind will come up with by then too.

More importantly, a big mahalo to those of you who have been clicking in to my little world over the last three years. I never realized how many masochists there are in the world. But I’m grateful that you are, and that you keep coming back for more of my abuse. So thank you. Especially to those of you who take the time to leave the occasional comment. Y’all make doing what I do worth doing. So you only have yourselves to blame.

Twinky Tuesday #3

25 Tuesday Feb 2014

Posted by Bangkokbois in Twinky Tuesday

≈ 4 Comments

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naked asian twink

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Sawatdee and welcome to the new and improved Bangkokbois Gay Thailand Blog! Okay, so it’s not necessarily improved, just hosted on a new site. And it’s not just about Thailand, though that still is the main focus. And it’s not all gay either, unless you’re not and then you’ll think it’s pretty damn gay I’m sure. All of the penis might tip you off. Which means if you are not of the required legal age to be looking at penis other than your own, you should leave. And go tell your parental units they suck at their job.

But it is a blog and one out of three ain’t bad. Besides, Bangkokbois Pretty Gay Mostly About Thailand Blog For People Of Legal Age is just too wordy. But so is Dancing With The Devil In The City Of Angels, which is really the title of this blog.

As cool of a title as that is, Google just ain’t sharp enough to figure out that means this blog is mostly about Thailand. And pretty damn gay to boot. The penis part even Google figured out. Which is a good thing. ‘Cuz Bangkokbois Pretty Gay Mostly About Thailand With Lots Of Penis Blog For People Of Legal Age, I think, was taken by someone else.

Move along, there’s nothing to see here folks; pay no attention to that man behind the curtain:

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