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Hump Day Is Bump Day #56
18 Wednesday Mar 2015
Posted Hump Day Is Bump Day
in18 Wednesday Mar 2015
Posted Hump Day Is Bump Day
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17 Tuesday Mar 2015
Posted It's A Gay World
inToday is St, Patrick’s Day, the one day out of the year everyone is a little bit Irish – ‘little’ being the operative word considering that men from The Emerald Isle are infamous for their leprechaunesque proportions. But then that’s the luck of the Irish. Kinda like having their patron saint not really being Irish; St. Patrick was born to Roman parents in Wales in the late fourth century. Or Ireland being named the top destination and transit country for sex trafficking in 2014. Or that St. Patrick’s Day in Ireland was a dry holiday until 1970. Or Sinead O’Connor.
But since it’s a day to party even when it doesn’t fall on a weekend, the world ignores those pesky little details and celebrates all things Irish. Or at least Guinness. It’s estimated over 12 million pints of quintessential Irish brew will be downed today. It’s also estimated that 75% of all fatal car accidents on March 17 will involve a driver whose blood-alcohol level is twice the legal limit. And ya have to assume with a gay contingent being allowed to march in New York’s St. Patrick’s Day parade for the first time ever this year, whoever decided they would bring up the rear musta had a few pints in him too.
I thought I’d found the perfect hook for today’s post while watching The Layover last week. The episode was set in Dublin (the one in Ireland) and Anthony Bourdain made mention of a rumor about drinking Guinness. “Turns out it actually might be, or has been associated with unexpected penile enlargement,” said he. Finally a bit of luck for the Irish male where it is so desperately needed, thought I. So I Googled it. Nyet. Nada. Zero. Nothing. Other than one search result listing Bourdain’s cruel sense of humor. ‘Cuz there are some things too implausible for even the internet to believe. No problemo. It ain’t mere coincidence that Bottom’s Up is a popular toast when downing a pint, and St. Patrick’s Day wouldn’t be the popular holiday it is if not for those pint-sized men of Ireland.
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17 Tuesday Mar 2015
Posted Twinky Tuesday
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16 Monday Mar 2015
Posted Wats of Thailand
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As popular as they are on the internet, I don’t post cute videos of kittens doing funny things on this blog. Not just because of my general aversion to pussy, but because cats are vile, vindictive, evil creatures who are only in it for themselves. They may have others fooled, but I know what we really need to fear is not the zombie apocalypse but rather the day the cats decide to make their move. Besides, I’ve always thought the pix of naked Asian dudes I post are all the daily dose of cuteness ya really need.
My mom has a cat. I’ve never bothered to learn what its name is. ‘Cuz Lucifer works just as well. When I visit, it runs and hides in some dark little corner of the house. Which, temporarily, is the closest to its home turf – hell – that it can find. Moms thinks it just doesn’t like men. Which alone would be reason enough to despise the creature. But I know what it doesn’t like are my hiking boots. And walls. I never said cats aren’t intelligent. Or at least trainable.
Moms thinks she’s trained her cat too. ‘Cuz she has a two foot square area of her home designated as an open sewer for the cat to shit and piss in when it isn’t busy shitting and pissing in some other part of the house that for some unfathomable reason pissed it off. So just who trained who is debatable. That cats are evil is not. Just consider that when the gods were creating the world and finally got down to felines, the cat said, “Hey, ya know what? When you make our penis, make it barbed.”
That’s what my psyche reminds me of anytime I see a cat. Barbed penis. I’d post a photo for those of you who don’t know what I’m talking about, but with the bee penis photo I posted last week still freshly in your minds, that may be too much. It could be the straw that broke the camel’s back. And then in your weakened mental state, you’d end up going out and buying a cat for a pet.
Dogs are an entirely different matter. Okay, not Chihuahuas. Chihuahuas are not really dogs. They’re the failed attempt by The Cat Agenda to breed with another species to fool humans while they populated the world with Satan’s spawn. But real dogs, those whose height comes up to your knee, are a bountiful blessing of pure love. They are the Thai bar boy of the animal world. As long as you take care of them, they will do anything for you. They are always happy to see you, and no matter how long it’s been since the last time they locked eyes with you, when you return again the joy on their faces is like their entire world has just begun again.
So while it is not unusual (nor exciting) to run across a cat at a Wat in Thailand, supposedly as a deterrent to rats – as though that was the real problem – meeting a temple’s dog helps remind you of what The Buddha is all about. Dogs are enlightened animals. They exhibit all the principles that Buddhism teaches. And I’m pretty sure when you’ve lived the best life you can, your final reward is to be reincarnated as a dog.
Which brings us to Wat Yai Sawang Arom, a temple in Thailand I’ve never visited. But now plan to. That’s the nice thing about being a wataholic. There is always yet another temple to discover. And this one not only has a temple dog, but a pack of them. Better yet, Wat Yai Sawang Arom’s wolf-pack is 99% It’s-All-About-Love golden retrievers. Which also brings us to my first ever embedded video. ‘Cuz making you click over to watch the video wouldn’t be in the spirit of a golden retriever. (Whereas with a cat you’d not only have to click but doing so would take you to a site showing lesbian porn.)
(Okay. So WordPress is evidently run by a cat. You can’t embed videos. Or maybe only videos of dogs are not allowed. So you will have to click on this photo after all.
But I promise it is not of lesbians.)
As for the wat itself, there’s a Wat Yai Sawang Arom in/on/by Koh Kret, one down by Phuket, one in Singburi province, and one up by Chiang Mai. So I’m not yet sure which has the golden retrievers. The one in Singburi has a huge collection of Nang Yai (over-sized shadow puppets) and is one of the few places in Thailand you can still watch a performance of this traditional art. So even without the dogs it’d still be a cool place to visit. And I’ve been looking for a better excuse than pottery to hit Koh Kret, so maybe a day playing with dogs might do the trick.
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16 Monday Mar 2015
Posted Monday Meat
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15 Sunday Mar 2015
Posted Sunday Funnies
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15 Sunday Mar 2015
Posted Selfies Sunday
in≈ Comments Off on Selfies Sunday #55
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14 Saturday Mar 2015
Posted End of the Week
in≈ Comments Off on End Of The Week #182
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Considering the unusually large number of downloads of the pix of hotties with a cup of joe I posted in my most recent Eye Candy Post, Starbucks musta known they had a goldmine that had nothing to do with coffee beans. Which may explain why their coffee sucks. No problemo. Here’s a Grande serving of Men And Coffee from Instagram.
The Good General wants Thailand to be a happy place for tourists too so there’s a new 24/7 hotline for visitors who want to whine about all things Thai. With operators standing by who speak English, Japanese, and Chinese, it’s geared towards expats too. Which probably means if you do call the number you’ll get a busy signal.
The hunk from Thailand got an honorable mention for being hot in the recent Mr. Global beauty pageant, and the important part of the competition – the part with hot guys in tiny swimsuits – is worthy of five minutes of your time.
Couture is now part of my vocabulary.
Forget about Justin Bieber’s photoshopped Calvin Klein ad, photographer Jan Dirk van der Burg documents the iconic brand in a salute to what shoppers in Thailand will be quite familiar with – the not-so-well-done knock-off – in his new book Calvin Klein: The Dyslexic Collection.
This week’s NSFW Tumblr link is xiaohaogayphotoblog, which may not know what to do with white space in its name but knows how to fill the space on its pages with some really hot Asian guys. Oh. And some twinks too.
While most only rate a single label, Thailand ranks Singha and Chang equally in the Every Country’s Most Popular Beer infographic.
In this week’s All Things Penis news:
And You Thought Finger Painting Was Fun.
Artist Brent Ray Fraser takes to the great outdoors to oil up his canvas with his penis.
Just Say Neigh.
A Wisconsin man arrested for giving head to a horse (after arousing it with a hand job) has been released on a $2,000 bond and ordered to not have any further contact with said horse.
Is That A Banana In Your Pocket?
Tesco has the secret to obtaining a four hour erection and it’s available at a supermarket near you.
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