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Bigger is Better

It’s not just the accent that makes French men so appealing.

Greece and Italy seem to be getting most of the blame for the sorry state of the Euro these days. Shouldn’t be a big surprise, the men of those countries are responsible for lowering the over all average size of European manhood too. Whether it is economic growth or penile growth, outside influences play a big part in how one measures up. But there is a natural limit to just how big any can country grow, and a natural limit to the endowment capabilities of its citizens too. According to a recently released graphic of the state of the state of man’s state by country, France has more than just the Eiffel Tower to brag about, and can happily rest on any size-queen’s laurels.

European Penis Size Map

For U.S. readers, chill. Those numbers are in centimeters. You can still hold your heads up high.

The survey of penile length places Hungary as the top European spot you’d want to be born in, but that shouldn’t be a surprise either; that you are going to be born blessed is even alluded to in the country’s name. But every centimeter and kilometer counts: slip across the border into Romania and you turn into a dickless wonder only unsurpassed by the Irish whose small country is evidently filled with small men.

And yes, this is why the internet was born . . .