Everyone is pretty much aware by now that smoking is dangerous to your health. Newbies to Bangkok should also be aware that smoking can be dangerous to the health of your wallet. While Thailand’s gem scam industry gets all the press, two scams blessed by the government are encountered on Bangkok’s streets daily. And while 2,000 baht may not sound like a lot of money to you, multiplied by the number of scofflaws who pony up fine money daily, we’re talking some serious moola. Which is why, despite widespread warnings, this practice continues.
Trash littering the streets is part of the urban scene in Bangkok. And I don’t mean the occasional Big Mac wrapper blowing down the street. The gutters are filled with refuse – and yeah, if it moves that was a rat – piles grow around lamp posts and telephone poles. The only place you don’t see litter collecting is around streetside trash bins. Because there are none. Discarding whatever is in your hand that you no longer have a need for is a way of life for the town’s denizens. Touri are often more circumspect, having been trained to not litter back home or just out of respect for the country they are visiting. And that’s why Bangkok’s litter police are a scam. Many touri who find themselves being fined on the spot never were guilty of littering in the first place.
Most scams and cons rely on greed; they are always based on the greedy who think they are getting something for nothing. The twist here is that you get scammed for doing nothing. And yes, some who fall prey to the litter police actually are guilty of the crime. But it’s still a scam. Because the guilty are only touri. Locals are never busted for littering. But then most locals don’t have 2,000 baht to hand over on a whim either.
I encountered the litter police for the first time a good decade ago. My travel partner Dave had run down the street for a six-pack. It was taking so much time that I began to worry about what trouble he’d gotten himself into when he burst through the hotel room’s door in a major snit-fit. A smoker, the litter police had been eyeballing him and decided he was guilty for nothing more than to have been sucking on a cancer stick while walking down Sukhumvit. He managed to get the fine down to 500 baht, all the money he had on him – and thank the gods he’d already bought the beer.
It wasn’t the money that had him so upset it was the injustice. Dave was exceptionally careful about not littering. When done with a smoke, he’d snub the cigarette out and pocket the butt. Every time we’d return to our hotel room, the first thing Dave would do would be to pull out a handful of cigarette butts from his pocket to dump in the trash. He’d even shown the ‘cops’ his stash of butts. They were less than impressed. They weren’t too impressed that the farang they’d stopped only had 500 baht on him either.
It didn’t help matters that Dave had been busted while I was notorious for flicking my butts into the gutters of Bangkok. A practice that came to a grinding halt that day. Not that that would prevent me from ever being busted for the offense. Step two was keeping an eye peeled for antilittering signs and then making sure I didn’t smoke anywhere near the area. And I adopted Dave’s habit of pocketing my butts even when not in a touri area of the city.
My friend Noom wasn’t impressed with my efforts at not littering. The first time he saw me pocket a butt he gave me his ‘Farang are so strange look’, let out a, “Why you do dat?” and emptied my pocket full of butts, throwing them into the street. To keep me from acting so silly again, for a while after that he’d hold out his hand whenever I finished a cigarette so he could take the karma blow for me. That was the practice until we upgraded to anytime I had a cigarette butt or piece of litter to dispose of, I’d just hand it to him so he could throw it on the ground. Which he’d do right in front of the litter police with no concern.
Bangkok’s litter police are not actually cops. They work for the BMA and are called thetsakij. But they look like cops and touri assume they are because who else would have the authority to stop you on the streets and demand that you pay a fine for breaking a city ordinance? The Bangkok Post ran an article on the scam a few years ago, and the deputy director of the City Law Enforcement Department. Manit Techaapichoke, suggested touri who feel they were being unduly targeted should refuse to pay the fine. If you take his advice, let me know how that turned out for you, okay?
If you get off the beaten path and stray into neighborhoods where the locals live instead of where touri congregate, you won’t see trash bins on the streets though you will see piles of garbage everywhere. You won’t see members of the litter police either. They are all stationed where the tourists are. There’s a fixed litter police station at the BTS elevated walkway by MBK that does big business. Mostly from smokers. Sukhumvit, from soi 2 down to soi 33 is a popular spot for the litter brigade to conduct business too, as my friend Dave discovered, and the area in front of Benjasiri Park next to Emporium is a prime fine collection spot too. In fact at Benjasiri Park you can also pay a 1,500 baht fine for feeding the pigeon population. Don’t worry if you find yourself at the park without feed, there are a mass of vendors there selling it.
I’m no longer a smoker, but I still keep an eye out for the litter police. Smokers are their favorite target because all smokers know they are guilty of something. But in a pinch, the litter police will bust you for the stray candy wrapper or empty water bottle too. Even if it wasn’t yours.
But then littering on the streets of Bangkok shouldn’t be your only concern. Crossing them too can be costly. The anti-litter efforts of the BMA were so popular that they expanded their efforts of separating cash from visitors’ pockets by adding jaywalking to their list of on the spot fineable offenses. For the last three years the city government has been cracking down on those who brave crossing Bangkok’s streets where they shouldn’t. And yup, the most dangerous jaywalking spots are all areas with a heavy farang presence.
Bangkok’s traffic problems are notorious. Streets often look more like parking lots than thoroughfares. When the traffic is at a standstill, and has been for the last ten minutes, it’s safer to jaywalk than it is to be driving. When the traffic is flowing – which is usually in three directions – considering the driving skills of the average Bangkokian if you are stupid enough to try to cross the street amidst the bumper-car derby that passes for traffic in Bangkok, you shouldn’t be fined. You should be rewarded. Pedestrian deaths are just part of life in the Big Mango.
The fine for jaywalking is only 200 baht, which explains why it is not as popular of a bust as littering is. Between soi 2 and 4 on Sukhumvit are prime jaywalking fine areas, as is where Patpong dead ends on Silom. My favorite spot to jaywalk is the intersection of New Petchburi and Ratchaprarop Roads, they have a cardboard cut-out of a Boy In Brown warning you to not jaywalk there. But the risky areas are always easy to spot. Just look for where all the locals are darting across the street.
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Kb said:
Hi. Just thought I should share experience. I have been to Bangkok many times over 15 years. This was first time I went to a gay sex show at Tawan and not sure what to do I asked host and he said I could buy beers for a guy. I bought a guy 4 beers and myself 6. Then I asked if its possible for massage. He said ok for 2000 baht =
1500 for him and 500 for guy.
And after awhile went next to door to tawan to massage place. All went ok but when I went to leave the guy wanted 1500 not 500. I only had the 500 as agreed. He got aggressive and as I ,eft I noticed Tawan was now closed (1am) and his mates were waiting on street. He demanded more money and pushed me around and grabbed me shirt. He tried to punch me and I ducked and got to street and into cab, could have been much worse and I’m sure because I am under 40 and fit I got away.
BE CAREFUL and don’t trust these guys. Watch the show and have a few drinks but forget anything more with the guys. I’m not sure if the regular price was more. But I agreed on price and wasn’t going to pay 3000 instead of 2000.
Just wanted to let you know…be careful
Bangkokbois said:
Thanks for sharing your warning KB.
I’d wondered if Tawan would be using their still relatively new massage shop next door to satisfy customers from the bar. Guess they are. Smart business move. Maybe I shoulda bought in for Noom. (Not!)
Okay, so there is a problem with your tale, things do not add up. You didn’t specify but I’m assuming your massage finished off with a happy ending. If so, the ‘tip’ for the guy should have been between 1,000 and 2,000 – the 1,500 he expected was reasonable. The 500 you paid was not. I’m sure he was pissed.
BUT, the 1,500 to the shop sounds high. If you were using the room as a short-time room (meaning you didn’t get a special oil & herb wrap and massage that lasted hours). Even then 3,000 total while pricey is not completely out of line for a massage with happy ending.
Since it sounds like you had a quick rub and tug, I think the 2,000 quoted perhaps was supposed to go the other way around. 500 to the shop, 1,500 to the guy. Language differences and 6-beers probably contributed to the miscommunication.
Anyone’s best move should this happen is to apologize to the guy to calm him down, and then get the waiter/manager/owner/mamasan who quoted your original price together with the boy and straighten the confusion out. There is nothing wrong either with reaffirming the agreed to split when you are dealing with fixed prices to make sure the guy too agrees to what you think you are supposed to be paying.
I don’t want to sound like I’m saying the problem was your fault – the 500 / 1,500 quote still sounds wrong to me. But had you confirmed with the guy, your unhappy ending would not have happened.
Mark said:
I think you are right about him having it backwards, 500 baht sounds right for their oil massage rooms (with bed instead of on floor in Thai massage room) thought its been a few weeks sence I walked past and 1500 baht for a short time off is about right to for a bar boy (massage parlors tips start 500-1000 depending with the place Hero and Prince are a thousand but The Sun looked no where as nice as even Hero much less Prince)
Bangkokbois said:
Thanks Mark, yes, that sounds more like what the split would be. Mahalos for the assist in clearing up the confusion.
Mark said:
Oh, and I had the massage place offered buy the mamasons at Tawan, I think they are steering business there, it seemed odd as they new I was staying next door at Glitz. Though to it might have been to make sure it was a very short term off as I had arrived early and the guy could have been back halfway through the show or earlier. More likely some of both bars never tire of making money, lol.
Bangkokbois said:
Yup, I could se where the availability of short-time space next door would be good for Tawan’s business and handy for some customers too. That must give the stars of the bar the opportunity to book a lot more off per night!
Al said:
After fifteen trips you went to a sex show at Tawan…uhuh. After 15 trips you don’t know the going rate or the mamasan scam bitches…uhuh. You had very limited cash in your pocket whilst perusing sex venues…uhuh. You are fit and under 40 allowing you to escape a severe handbag assault…uhuh.
Have you heard of Grindr….I’m sure it would serve you purpose admirably.
ChristianPFC said:
2000 Baht? They get off lightly. I would publicly whip people who throw their cigarette butts on the ground.
There usually is a bin in front of each 7-eleven, apart from that, I just add my refuse to existing piles.
In Samut Sakhon, there were blue drums for refuse every 100 m or so, and the streets were clean.
Bangkokbois said:
Come on Christian, you would publicly whip anyone for carrying a pack of smokes!
ChristianPFC said:
The headline is misleading. I thought the article is how to live on 2000 Baht per day. Even I could learn something from such an article.
Bangkokbois said:
lol
I knew that one would grab your attention Christian!
Mitch S. said:
He has to be the cheapest Christian on the boards. If I recall his typical daily expenses, they are:
Food stall fried rice = 30 baht
Nam Singh smuggled into bar or show to avoid rip-off prices = 7 baht
Shoe leather walking across town = 2 baht
Camfrog, gayromeo, cell phone usage, condoms, lube & used books = 961 baht
Tip = 1,000 baht (includes accommodations & shower at trick’s room)
Bangkokbois said:
LOL
I don’t think Christian has yet come up with the savings potential of getting a room without a shower and using your bar boy’s instead!
But know that it is out there . . .
Hendrikbkk said:
The anti-smoking brigade are the new nazis! In Hong Kong you get fined for smoking in the street (!) in certain areas, HK$2,000.
I truly miss the smell of a fresh pipe or a nice cigar or the smell of stale cigarettes the next morning after a party. I rather smell cigarettes then body odor or bad breath, there should be a police for that!
Bangkokbois said:
Well now that’s just silly Hendrik. If they were fining for body odor and bad breath the entire police department would have to move to Pattaya.
xiandarkthorne said:
Thanks for the heads-up, Hendrik. I have always avoided visiting Hong Kong in the past and now, I see even less reason to go there.
Al said:
And the bad breath on those boys is phewwwwwwwwwwww.
tim said:
OMG i dont belive it .. you and only you could have found it ..
congratulations .. you did it !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
the one and only picture of beachlover in thailand … tho he looks to have tried and shyed away .. you got him … all his friends too by the looks of it ..
he may try to deny its him .. but i know that 100 baht watch anywhere ,,
Bangkokbois said:
LOL
Well you know that is a very hi-so section of sidewalk.
Aidan said:
I just stumbled onto your page after googling “scams” in Bangkok. Anyhow, your blog is a great read. Can you do a piece on another kind of scam? That is, guys who want to meet you through Grindr then steal your stuff. Yes, I have heard about money boys, or meeting boys at club and bringing them home and having problem later. Grindr is a new venue and I was caught off guard. If you do a piece on this, it will be a great service for our community. Thanks.
Bangkokbois said:
Thanks Aidan.
I think you just did provide that warning.
🙂
But that’s a good idea for a post. Offing bar boys in Bangkok is usually safe, you need to be careful hooking up elsewhere.