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Love is in the air at the Castro Street Fair
I spent yesterday at the Castro Street Fair. It’s an annual street festival held in San Francisco’s premier gay neighborhood that attracts some 50,000 to 100,000 people each year. This year’s party was packed; San Francisco was enjoying one of those glorious summer days that would make a visitor who didn’t know better start planning his move to the city by the bay.
I haven’t attended one of SF’s gay bashes in several years. The Castro Street Fair is more of a community event and doesn’t get the crowds that the Folsom Street Fair gets every year. But then Folsom is all about leather and raunch, and half the attendance is straight folk coming to gawk. Castro gets some touri touir too, but the crowd is mostly gay. And mostly guys. And most of them were celebrating the summer-like weather by going shirtless. Um, when did gay men stop going to the gym? And once their muscles turn to fat, shouldn’t they stop wearing those skin tight T shirts? It used to be when you spotted a really fat guy at a gay street fair, he’d turn out to be a lesbian. Now it seems the fairs are populated by bears. But then those guys might be lesbians, too.
The Castro Street Fair draws thousands of gay men and a handful of lesbians every year.
The number of gay couples walking around holding hands was touching. That’s not unusual in the Castro, it’s one of the few places in the world two guys can show a bit of PDA without any fuss or getting their heads bashed in. I don’t think there is a more beautiful sight than two hot guys in love. And it was nice to see that ugly guys can find love and romance too. It’s even nicer, being two gay guys, that they can not produce off-spring.
I spent my day wandering about the district, flirting with the hotties and doing double-takes often when yet another victim of fashion strolled by. You’d think that since gay men love to shop they’d do a better job of it. Purple shoes, red pants, and a large print green and orange shirt is just plain wrong. Especially when worn together. Gay men are supposed to have a great sense of fashion; they’re not supposed to pull together an outfit my grandmother would adore.
Even in the U.S., the hot young Asian guys pair off with older men.
It was nice being surrounded by a few thousand gay men and to have the really fine ones appreciate that I was checking them out. Those that drew my eye for other reasons seemed to be as appreciative: we may have over-done the whole gay pride thing. Anyway, I thought I’d share some of my observations from the day with you.
Why is it that the few guys wandering street fests totally naked are always guys who shouldn’t be naked even in the privacy of their own homes?
Skinny jeans were a fad that shouldn’t have happened. It’s over, you need to get over it too.
If you like younger Latino men, you can easily score at a gay street fair in SF. Lots of hotties wandering around with a scared, nervous, but hopeful look in their eyes. But they panic if you speak Spanish to them.
If you have breasts a tranny would kill for, you should keep your shirt on and fully buttoned.
If you are going to be a psychic at a gay event, quit telling the gay boys you see a new woman coming into their life.
Nobody’s believes you really are a cowboy. And if a horse saw you dressed like that, it’d laugh.
Evidently if you have more hair on your back than most guys have on their chest, you are required to go shirtless at a gay street fair.
Are all bull dykes required to be as wide as they are short??
It is not a good idea to hire a DJ who lisps. The booming noise floating through the streets ends up sounding too much like rain.
Wearing a T-Shirt that says ‘Slave’ is not necessary. If you are serious about it, make the commitment and wear a collar and dog leash instead.
I just realized Laverne & Shirley were lesbians.
Guys with hot chests and nipples like the eraser end of a pencil that protrude outward by a half an inch or more are extremely sexy.
Percentage-wise, there are more men with great butts than there are women with acceptable butts.
If you want to score at a gay street fair, bring your dog.
I didn’t know you could buy yellow pants.
Leather is just not a good look during daylight hours.
It’s easy to tell who has a fetish and who is actually in the military.
Rainbows are not as popular as they once were. Camp, unfortunately, still is.
That kilt looked better in the store than it will ever look on you.
You can always tell a guy is a guy no matter how he is dressed. Lesbians can easily fool you.
It’s nice that older gay couples don’t color coordinate their clothing like straight senior citizens do.
Do little gay boys actually want to become a screeching queen when they grow up, or was that just a wrong life decision made some time during their journey?
There was a good reason these were on the Sale rack.
It’s a talent to be able to wear hiking boots and still walk like you have high heels on.
If you are going for the twink look, you need to shave your chest.
There is no such thing as a bisexual at a gay street fair.
More lesbians wear polo style shirts than men.
There is a huge potential for breast reduction surgery for men.
I don’t know if blondes really do have more fun, but I do know one who did. I had a pretty good time, too.
Drag queens and lesbians are often indistinguishable.
The hairy guy is scary, I hope I don’t get nightmares from this picture.
What does this mean: “But they panic if you speak Spanish to them.”?
The pelt bothered me too Christian. But not quite as much as the way it stopped at neck level.
And the tat threw me, too. Why get ink when it’s hidden behind a forest?
The panic comment: The latino boys out on their own were obviously closeted to a major degree. That’s largely due to their culture. So they panic when you use their language, it just strikes a bit too close to home and to discovery to them.