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18 Tuesday Mar 2014
Posted Twinky Tuesday
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17 Monday Mar 2014
Posted This Is Thailand . . .
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Thais take their religious beliefs quite seriously. So it stands to reason one of the more popular uses for the local wat is as a source for obtaining lucky numbers. Not that every local heads to his favorite temple to obtain what, obviously, will be that day’s winning lottery numbers. Those are as easily divined from innumerable sources: the number of times a gecko chirps in the morning, the address of a house that a kamikaze bird played death by window at, the numbers a frog croaked out after you gave it a cigarette to puff on, the hospital room number where a respected Buddhist monk known for foretelling lucky numbers died . . . and if you run across either a two-headed cow or five-legged dog, uh, hello?
There are virtually no lengths Thais will not go to in order to get that winning combination of numbers. Wats and monks are a good source, dreams are always a good bet for winning the pot of baht you’re dreaming of, and everyone knows the spirits in trees love nothing more than making winning number magically appear on their bark. The odd markings on a car left by a Naga who’d slithered over it wouldn’t be there if it wasn’t a sure sign of your path to riches. And birthdays, house numbers, car registrations, and cell phone numbers are all filled with numbers that will make you a winner too.
My friend Noom scoffs at these ridiculous attempts at foretelling what the winning numbers will be. But then one day when I tripped climbing up a flight of steps at the National Stadium BTS station, he carefully counted which number of stair I’d tripped on, and then the total number of steps to the station. And then we spent an hour walking around town so he could find a lottery ticket with those number on it. Don’t laugh. He won 10,000 baht. ‘Cuz even clumsy farang can be lucky if you play them right.
Finding a Thai who doesn’t believe in ghosts is easier than finding one who hasn’t played the lottery. At 40 baht per ticket, it’s an affordable means of gambling. Until you consider what the average daily wage earned by most Thais is. And then, because this is Thailand, that 40 baht ticket will actually cost you 100 baht. They come in sets, with a top and the bottom part, each bearing the same six digit number. And you can only buy them by the pair. So 40 baht becomes 80 baht,. Which has to be lucky for someone. Then there’s the 20 baht fee added by the seller. Unless he or she is lucky enough to have drawn a farang as a customer, then their odds of winning is increased by an additional 20 baht tacked on to the ticket cost.
On the plus side, if – or if you are Thai, when – you win, your prize money is doubled too. Unless you are a bar boy whose farang’s numbers just came in in the money. Then the sky is the limit. If your farang won 20,000 baht or less, you’ll take his ticket (and hopefully not him) to a local agent to cash it in. If he won more than 20,000 baht, you’ll have to get taxi money out of him to make the trek to the Government Lottery Office where you’ll receive a check for the winning amount. In either case, farang will always believe you when you tell them that only Thais can win the lottery. They are, after all, hansum men.
The official lottery in Thailand is drawn twice a month, on the first and sixteenth, give or take a day. First prize is 2 million baht. Or maybe that’s 3 million. Which, of course, is doubled, so it’s really 4 million. Or 6 million. There’s also a whole series of other cash prizes too, running from 1,000 to 100,000 baht, based on how many of your numbers come in, in which order, and/or how closely to the winning numbers your actual numbers were. But there’s also a tax imposed on winnings, from 50 satang per hundred baht won to 2 baht per hundred, depending on where you collect your winnings. All of which helps confuse farang, who probably were a but suspicious about purchasing lottery tickets from some old lady sitting on the curb in front of McDonalds in the first place.
No problemo. Thais know better. And every Thai knows, whatever magical formula he used to pick his numbers, the lottery is his best chance at becoming rich. Well, finding a farang to ‘sponsor’ you is the best way of ensuring those riches, but the lottery is always a close second.
The first official lottery by the Thai government was held in 1874 as part of the celebration honoring Rama V’s birthday. The second (and third) lotteries in Thailand were thanks to the Brits. During WWI, England wanted to borrow money from the Thai government but was concerned that a direct loan might affect the monetary stability of the Kingdom. So they sold lottery tickets instead. Who won those lotteries is lost to history, but as with all forms of gambling, the real winner was the house. Which in this case was the House of Windsor. In 1932, the Thai Red Cross go into the lottery game, and by 1939 Thailand’s official government lottery finally was run by the official Thai government, which, some 35 years later, morphed into the twice-a-month lottery that all Thais are familiar with today.
The most recent lottery was held this weekend. I’ve yet to hear back from Noom (who is probably busy counting his winnings) but since there was a tie-in with past lucky numbers being lucky for a change, I assume he played the lottery big time. On Saturday, Prime Minister Yingluck Shinawatra tripped while getting out of her car in Chiang Mai. And if a falling farang is worth 10,000 baht, an equally embarrassed PM has gotta be worth a million or two. Or if you are fond of wearing a red shirt, that’s gotta be worth the fate of the nation.
This morning Thailand’s Government Lottery Office is being grilled over whether or not this weekend’s lottery numbers were selected randomly, despite the process they use to pick those numbers being more convoluted than the various ways of winning. A group of anti-government protesters even marched on the Lottery Bureau demanding an investigation. Their problem is that the last two digits prize, and Sunday’s lottery result were, 79. Which matched the last two digits of one of the two vans Yingluck rode in while in Chiang Mai.
Even worse, depending on your political affiliations, in the underground lottery (which uses the official lottery’s winning numbers, but offers better odds) the last three digits prize winning number was 404. Which matched the license plate number of the lucky van she lost her balance in front of.
Supporters of Yingluck’ troubled government, which is facing yet another election at the beginning of next month, claim the coincidence of the winning lottery number and the accident-prone PM’s Northern Thailand stumbling visit is a sign that she is the rightful leader of the country. The sore losers backing other political hopefuls, and undoubtedly also losers in the most recent lottery, are crying foul. So it’s politics, and superstitions, as usual in Thailand.
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17 Monday Mar 2014
Posted It's A Gay World
in≈ Comments Off on Happy St. Patrick’s Day!
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They say that on St. Patrick’s Day, everyone is a little bit Irish. Unless, evidently, you’re gay. While most Americans celebrate the holiday by guzzling copious amounts of green beer, an as popular tradition is banning gay contingents from marching in your St. Paddy’s Day parade.
But like marriage being only between a man and a woman, that tradition too may be becoming a thing of the past. This year the major parades that insist being Irish and being gay are incompatible are finding their major corporate sponsors abandoning ship, and their favorite local politicians choosing to not march in a gayless parade. That leaves Ted Cruz as their only not-really-Irish political choice, and Ford as their only sponsor. Not that any self-respecting gay man would be caught dead riding in a Ford. Or riding Ted Cruz for that matter.
You’d think with the Irish’s history in this country, they’d be one of the groups more supporting of minority rights. But like cake bakers across the country, they’re confusing civil rights with religious freedoms. And like those who’ve come before them, they too have decided to come down on the wrong side of history. Which, ironically, is often the side of the country’s religious right. No problemo. They can erin go fuck themselves. While everyone else has a happy St. Patrick’s Day.
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17 Monday Mar 2014
Posted Monday Meat
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16 Sunday Mar 2014
Posted Selfies Sunday
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15 Saturday Mar 2014
Posted End of the Week
inKhateoy Never Cheats is a Thai music video that tells the story of a ladyboy who never forgets her first love: her best friend in high school. Many years pass and she meets her crush at a bar, fighting with another woman. Certain he cannot recognize her, she approaches the man she loved and takes him home . . .
Jamie Dornan does 50 shades of nakedness . . .
. . . and Jake Gyllenhaal offers up something better to climb in Everest.
The top ten signs that you have lived in Bangkok too long work equally well for having visited the city too often.
Translating the English concept of ‘gay’ into Thai has never been easy, what the word means to you may not mean the same to a local guy. But this handy diagram clears the air. As long as you can keep track of 11 sexualities and 3 sub-sexualities.
Or if you just want to get down to what really matters, take this quiz to find out if you are really a top or a bottom.
I Love Asian Gays is this week’s NSFW Tumblr link. But then who doesn’t.
38 Real Size Comparisons That Will Make Your Head Explode offers some unique perspectives but not, unfortunately, using the head you usually measure things by.
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14 Friday Mar 2014
Posted Aloha Friday
in≈ Comments Off on Aloha Friday #5
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13 Thursday Mar 2014
Posted 7 Shots
in≈ Comments Off on 7 Shots: Where’s Buddha?
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I’m not sure which would be the greater number: how many Buddhas there are in SE Asia or how many photos of Buddhas I’ve taken in SE Asia. In any case, applying The 7 Shot Rule to either would take the patience of, well, Buddha. So I guess it was inevitable that at some point I’d do a 7 Shots: Buddhas post. Or maybe even seven of them.
Hell, I could easily do seven posts of just Buddhas smothered in gold. Without ever leaving Bangkok. But back when I started this series of posts I determined that with travel photography a good image is one that instantly transports you back to time and place. And while a cropped photo of a humongous golden Buddha’s knee may seem like a good subject at the time (and has for me on a few dozen different occasions) by itself it really doesn’t fill that criteria. Even those gold covered Buddhas that are named and are quite famous in their own right look a lot alike. If it wasn’t for other photos taken at whichever wat that Buddha calls home, I’d never be able to identify them.
As similar as many Buddha statues are, some do stand out. Even if they are not standing. So I thought I’d start with photos of seven of the more distinctive Buddhas I’ve encountered in SE Asia. Each of these photos works under the 7 Shots Rule premise; it may take me a minute to come up with the right wat’s name where some of them can be found, but even at that, immediately, I can tell you where that wat is.
But can you?
You can consider today’s post a Buddhist version of Where’s Waldo? You can also consider it a good example of how badly I follow rules ‘cuz there are eight photos instead of seven (which is also a good example of how badly I suck at math). But there’s a reason for that. Since I decided this post would be a challenge for you to name where each photo was taken, and thought I should offer a prize of $1,000 to the first person to get all of the answers correct, throwing in a ringer was my natural inclination. I mean it’d be nice if you were the winner by coming up with all of the correct answers, but then that’d mean I’d be the loser (and out a thousand bucks) so whether or not to rig the game . . . well, there was no challenge in deciding that question. Duh.
I’m posting these from what I consider the easiest to the most difficult (with the exception of the first, which if you can provide the specific locale for – along with getting the other seven right too – you will win a grand). The only hint I’ll give you is that while most are from Thailand, one or more may be from other SE Asian countries. And yeah, if you only get seven of the eight right all you’ll win is bragging rights. But I’ll be impressed. As so may be the Buddha. And that’s gotta be a good thing.
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