This week Jabba’s band of merry boy lovers have been busy lamenting the cruelty of hotels in Thailand that charge a joiner fee. The issue has recently come to a head thanks to one of Bangkok’s better known dives, The Pinnacle Lumpinee Hotel, recently deciding to enforce their joiner fee policy. The sexpats are incensed that it can now cost them an extra $15 to use their hotel room for sex. And Jabba, the world traveller and hotel aficionado that he is, has decreed thanks to that policy they’ve lost his business.
Management at the Pinnacle are holding a party this weekend to celebrate the effectiveness of their new policy.
A joiner fee, for the uninitiated, is a charge some hotels in Thailand levy against a guest for bringing an unregistered ‘friend’ back to their hotel room. At its most basic, it’s a fee the hotel charges for pimping out its rooms. 500 baht is the going rate. Other hotels impose the fee, sometimes as high as 2,000 baht, to discourage their lobby from looking like a brothel. It’s also an effective way to keep fat, cheap ass sexpats from Pattaya out of your establishment. Some of the bars would do well to emulate this business practice.
Nothing raises the blood pressure of Pattaya sexpats quicker than an unexpected outlay of anything more than two bucks. Of course it’s the principle, not the money, that gets them going. Objecting to the fee one pundit wrote:
“Rules should never be accepted merely by the fact that they have been imposed by some authority. One should always question the validity of rules, as this is a major part of being a mature and responsible citizen.”
Right. It’s a case of civil disobedience and not an objection to a hotel cashing in on a customer’s decision to engage in a bit of prostitution. And we all know nothing is more productive in Thailand than arguing with a local about the rule you just ran up against and didn’t like. Happy holiday, dude.
I’ve never stayed at the Pinnacle Lumpinee Hotel. For years I’ve read on the message boards that to save a few bucks you need to use the services of some local guy named Jimmy to book your room. Then when you arrive, you go to his room and hand over your cash. Sorry, call me old fashioned but I prefer to check into a hotel using their registration desk. I’ve got nothing against a bit of sleaze, but don’t see its appeal while registering into a hotel room thanks. Besides, a three star hotel quickly on its way to two star status that requires a ten minute walk to the closest MRT station is never gonna make it to the top of my hotel list for Bangkok. Though I do appreciate the idea of a $35 a night hotel imposing almost a 50% surcharge for using its rooms as a flop house. I’m just surprised they didn’t begin doing so sooner.
Joiner fees may not be unheard of in Thailand, but they are not the norm. At least not for most visitors. They are, however, popular with down-market establishments, especially those near the city’s naughty areas and/or those hotels popular with tourists who only visit Bangkok for its commercial sex industry. I consider joiner fees to be a ‘No Respect’ tax, not unlike the nickel and dimed to death backpacker trash who by going cheap pay twice the price of what their stay in Bangkok should cost them. A few 5 star hotels also have a joiner fee, usually in the thousands of baht, to discourage customers from bringing back prostitutes, though most of those hotels instead just have a ‘No Guest’ policy.
It is not surprising that Jabba’s boys who are demanding to know how a hotel can justify charging this fee are the same who feel it is incumbent on the hotel to check their boy du jour’s ID card and/or to hold it at the registration desk until the punter has had his fun and sent his latest off with a thin wad of baht in hand. Because that service and use of manpower should of course be included in the thirty bucks per night they pay. And there better be a full buffet breakfast every morning too dammit! These guys are the reason the gods invented Pattaya.
Sometimes referred to as ‘Guest Friendly’ hotels – which really is what people mean when they ask about ‘Gay Friendly’ establishments – cheap hotels that do not impose a joiner fee are popular amongst sex tourists. There are even a few websites devoted to listing those places (thanks more to the straight trade than to the gay customer base). Most hotels that do charge joiner fees state so somewhere on their website. If the idea of your hotel pimping out its rooms bothers you, by all means pick an establishment that doesn’t do so. If on the other hand you are more ambivalent about the fee, there are a few steps you can take to help avoid additional charges showing up on your bill at checkout.
1. Quit Being A Cheap Ass. Hotels that charge 1,000 baht or less per night are more likely to insist on the payment of a joiner fee. At those rates, any money they can collect is important to their bottom line. Upgrade from the start and you can avoid checking into a place that charges joiner fees. Besides, your cheap room just got less cheap: a 900 baht per night room with a joiner fee added just became a 1,400 baht room.
2. Book A Double Room. The cost for a double room as opposed to a single one at almost all hotels in Thailand is the same. Many that have a joiner fee policy will not charge it if you are single and staying in a double room. Yes, I know, that doesn’t make any sense but then this is Thailand. An added benefit is that if your room comes with breakfast by booking a double you’ll have an extra meal ready to go if you keep your boy overnight.
3. Dress For Success. I thought that was a nicer heading than ‘Don’t Look Like A Fat Dirty Sleazeball Sex Touri’. Thai are very image conscious and react toward your appearance. Whether that reaction is negative or positive is up to you. Coming back from the bars late a night looking like you spent your night crawling through Bangkok’s gutters almost guarantees a joiner fee will be charged. Look like a respectable guest instead and the staff may not even notice you have a companion with you. Of course if your boy looks like a two dollar whore, all bets are off.
4. Pre-Negotiate A Waiver. If you have never had the joy of trying to argue with a Thai about a policy you just ran up against, let me save you some frustration. Don’t. You will not win. If you feel you should not be charged a joiner fee the time to establish that is before it is levied, not during or after. Agoda can’t do a thing for you, but if you book your room direct with the hotel you’ll be surprised how easy it is to get this type of fee waived for your entire stay. Just get it in writing along with the name of the person who agreed to waive the fee.
5. Sneak Your Boy In. This is a great idea. But please drop me an email and tell me which hotel you are staying at so I can come by and watch the festivities. The Ambassador is famous for the extents their staff will go to to nail guests who try to sneak a visitor past their joiner fee policy. Sometimes even the Boys in Brown get involved. There aren’t many other opportunities for that much fun when trying to save $15 in Bangkok, so go for it and really make your holiday a memorable one.
6. Get A Short-Time Room. I guess if you need to stand on your principles you can take your new friend to one of the numerous short-time hotels scattered around Bangkok’s gay night-life areas. You’ll pay the same as the fee your hotel would charge you for bringing back a guest, if not more, but I’m sure that will teach them a lesson.
7. Go For The Long-Term. If you booked a double room and found a guy you’d like to spend the rest of your holiday with, register him into your room. This avoids the whole joiner fee mess. BUT, once you have done so realize he now has complete access to your room, all of the hotel’s facilities, and all room charging opportunities the hotel offers. With the wrong guy, this can end up being more costly than paying a nightly joiner fee. With the right guy, you’ll have just given him major face and can expect your own pleasure to ratchet up accordingly.
8. Go Get A Massage. You can also avoid being charged a joiner fee by getting a massage instead. As infamous as the Ambassador is for its strict joiner fee policy, you can order up an in-room happy ending from the hotel’s spa and enjoy the comforts of your room without paying a joiner fee there (though you will pay for the massage and a tip for the service). Hitting one of the massage shops anywhere in town will also avoid being charged a fee by your hotel since you’ll take care of all of your business off site instead. Or better yet, go hit one of the gay saunas in town and you might just get your rocks off for free.
9. Cut Your Joiner Fee In Half. If value for the money you spend is your concern, go ahead and pay the joiner fee but double down on your fun. Bring two boys back to your room instead of one and you just cut your joiner fee in half. Four boys would cut it to a quarter, and if you schedule a big enough orgy the fee should zero out. Okay, so math was never my strong point, but sex and fun is, and since that is the point, are you really gonna cry over a lousy $15 bucks?
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Hendrikbkk said:
It is indeed the hottest topic on the Fat Man’s chit chat corner of yes men next of course to the delicious soup of some semi-blind Aussie gourmet chef which killed the Man almost.
These are the same people who haul their luggage one floor up at the airport to avoid paying the 50 bath fee for airport taxis and then ask for reviews of 5 star hotels, cause they ‘thinking of going there’, yeah sure.
Since Beachlover left us, there is no one to help us out on that. You think his Gulfstream crashed on the way to the wedding?
Bangkokbois said:
I’m sure that much like anal warts Beachball will be popping up again soon.
I’ve always been amazed at the guys who pull that trick at the airport and brag about it to boot. Seems like a lot of work to save a buck. I mean if I was already at the departures floor I’d go outside and grab a taxi, but to haul my luggage up there to save 50 baht? Really?
Glenn said:
Of course that is not limited to just this particular board. All sorts of travel forums have that “tip”. People seem to think you have to wait a long time for a taxi when you go to the official stand on the lower level. I don’t know why they think that.
Bangkokbois said:
Good point Glenn, the catch a taxi at departures tip crosses a wide section of Thailand visitors. I read somewhere recently that they had installed barriers so that you could not get a luggage cart back out to the roadway to help prevent this practice – so it is pretty well-known.
bkkguy said:
“Seems like a lot of work to save a buck. I mean if I was already at the departures floor I’d go outside and grab a taxi, but to haul my luggage up there to save 50 baht? Really?”
the last time I was at the airport there were no taxis on the arrivals level, you had to go down a level to get to the public taxi stand and there was a queue a mile long – so haul you luggage down (though going down is always a good thing!), wait an hour and pay 50 Baht or haul your luggage up, save 50 baht and fight security moving the taxis on is a bit of a crap shoot – personally I will book a limo with immigration fast track!
bkkguy
Bangkokbois said:
lol
Yes, the limo does avoid the whole taxi experience!
Al said:
I can’t believe people still read this shit over at SGT. Come on the site is dead and won’t lie down. Carnaptious, unwashed old queens rooted in Pattaya and their daily tales of woe. Spare me.
Also have I stood and shook my head in wonderment at the bartering carried out by the hard nose bargain hunters, am I really going to elevate my blood pressure for a buck fifty? I think not. If they only really new what I thought of their repulsive display of macho bartering….geee
Bangkokbois said:
Damn. You’re right Al. That’s a buck and a half, not a buck. That’s a different story.
🙂
bkkguy said:
if hotels don’t want unregistered guests in rooms (prostitutes or otherwise) they should have a “no guests” policy, if hotels want to allow guests to bring back “friends” they should price thier rooms to incude this and allow extra towels and breakfast as required
once they start charging “joiner fees” they are just trying to cash in on prostitution while pretending to hold the moral high ground!
bkkguy
Bangkokbois said:
You’re right Bkkguy, but then that would be the logical approach. And we can’t have that!
Alex said:
Telling people what they can and cannot do just isn’t the Thai way. I think it’s much more clever to hit those guests you don’t like with “outrageous” extra charges and/or embarrassing procedures. Not only will they stay away, as a bonus they’ll also rant about it and inform like-minded fellows that they shouldn’t stay there either.
Bangkokbois said:
And ya make a few bucks out of it too!
Al said:
Ha , welcome to Thailand….lmao.
musiqlava said:
You simply must give me the name of those twins or maybe where I can get more of them
Bangkokbois said:
Makes ya hope there are more brothers in the wings, huh Musiqlava?
musiqlava said:
Google search has a feature whereby you enter the url of the image and you immediately get a history of all websites that have posted that photo. The twins picture u posted in particular has been cut off at the legs and a search reveals the full picture. Of course it follows that I can use that feature to find out which websites you visit by simply entering the url of images on this blog. It also tells you the lengths I was willing to go to to get my hands on a whole collection of photos for those twins 🙂 Alas it turned out to be the only photo they took for an online clothing “mall”
musiqlava said:
Turns out I lied there’s lots more where that came from just took some diligence. If only I worked this hard on my career 🙂
Bangkokbois said:
. . . and there goes my Sunday.
ChristianPFC said:
I don’t know how you got from joiner fees to the 50 Baht airport charge for taxis, but now that you mentioned it, let me chime in.
Apart from my first holiday (where I agreed to a set fee of 600 Baht – and had to listen to offers of girl, boy, young girl, young boy, tailor, jewelery all the way – after half a dozen taxis at arrival refused to use the meter) I always go to the departure floor to get a taxi there. No waiting, no fee, no problem with meter.
For me, there is no better way to start a holiday than saving 50 Baht just by going up one floor (ok, one day my arrival time will allow me to take the bus, that will be even better).
Bangkokbois said:
As big of a cheapskate as you are Christian, that’s why I enjoy you. You take so much pleasure in saving a few pennies its like watching a kid on Christmas morning.