When you are thousands of miles away, trying to keep up with what passes for a political process in Thailand can be difficult. Other than the occasional bit about rioting in the streets, or an ill-advised attempt at trying to explain what all the turmoil is about – ill-advised because the journalists making that attempt haven’t a clue about what makes Thailand tick – the American mainstream media isn’t really interested. The English language Thai daily news organizations are, but other than plotting movement – thanks to a bias that makes FOX News look impartial – there’s not much there to help you get a grasp on what’s really happening either. Thai language new organizations are probably no better. But I don’t read Thai so I’m not sure. And Google seems to be too busy conquering the world to bother making its Translate app useful for something other than an occasional snicker over how badly it mangles its job.

Of course thanks to the internet everyone’s a critic these days. And when you want to be critical of the government – current, future, or past – the world wide web and social media is where you turn to. Back when I started this blog I wrote a piece complementing Cruising For Sex Thailand because a poster there had been providing a running commentary on the state of the state during the original Red Shirts’ decision to turn Bangkok into their own private camping ground. His was the sole bit of reporting that provided a true picture of what was happening on the city’s streets without spiraling into a discussion on which side was right and which was wrong. And his reporting was timely too. Not so this time around. Other than a cut and paste article about the short-lived curfew that was imposed two weeks ago, CST’s focus has been on which bars and saunas are your best choice for your next orgasm.

Though currently the message boards are about as dead as Yingluck’s political career, there has been some discussion about the protests, politics, and how the current unrest is impacting the average sex tourist in Bangkok. But after a lot of supposition, many digressions, degradations, and animadversions – and of course Jabba The Butt’s fondness for cut and past news articles that obviously no one else would have been capable of finding if not for his board – you quickly realize that those who should be somewhat knowledgable about Thailand thanks to living or visiting there often are as clueless as mainstream media journalists. And that they’d do better discussing subjects they are familiar with. Like which bars in Sunee no longer employ underage bar boys (wink, wink).

I don’t remember who it was or on which board it was, but someone recently attempted to provide a ‘man on the streets’ report of the current unrest. Unfortunately all he could manage was to whine about how long it took him to get to Khao San Road on the bus. With said bus stopping before it got to where all the protestor are hanging out by the Democracy Monument and telling the passengers to get out and walk. But anyone familiar with Bangkok would have known either water route would have been a better transportation choice to Khao San since even FOX News knows the Democracy Monument is ground zero for the anti-Thaksin crowd right now. So thanks for that.

Part of the problem is that farang are trying to make sense out of what is senseless; farang are attempting to explain how the Thai mind and Thai politics works. As though our own political foibles are any more explainable. I’d explain Thai politics for you, but I’m too busy trying to make sense out of Ted Cruz. And not being there, I can’t tell you where the hot spots are – other than the Democracy Monument area – but I can tell you Patpong and Soi Twilight are not in the thick of things. When your job requires you no wear a shirt it’s difficult being political in Bangkok. So no worries, huh? And I can tell you that if you want to apply a bit of logic to trying to understand what all the rioting and whistle blowing is about, and just how dangerous the latest version of a coup may be to your travel plans, you need know nothing more than an understanding of the driving force behind everything that happens in Thailand: sanuk.

Sanuk, loosely defined, means fun. And it is a way of life for most Thais. It’s probably why they smile so much. No matter how mundane or odious the task at hand may be, Thais will find a way to have fun doing it. And while major skirmishes, death, and the army occasionally getting involved and taking over, may appear to be anything but fun, the Thai version of the democratic process also means getting to wear a red or yellow shirt, camping out on the city’s streets, blowing whistles, and burning down a major shopping mall. It almost sounds like a Beach Boys’ song.

Part of me still wants to know what is happening with the protests and how that impacts both those living in and visiting Bangkok. So I turn to the new organizations and read about the folks formerly known as Yellow Shirts taking over Government House. Go Yellow Shirts! Better that than the airport in any case. But then I discover it wasn’t so much about ‘taking over’ as walking through the gates that had been opened for them. Um, Go Gate Guards? Sure there has been some blood spilled, and – technically – a government toppled, but in the end it’s all been as earth shattering as the news that China just landed an unmanned spacecraft on the moon. Big Whoop. Life goes on. Yes, it matters. But so does that the federal government just began recognizing same-sex couples as families during the customs declarations process for those entering the U.S. Nice to know, but yawn worthy at the same time. And where’s the sanuk in that?

So I’ve allowed the highlights of the current political upheaval in Thailand to enter my realm of consciousness – it’s good to know elections will be held early next February ‘cuz election periods in Thailand are dry so that means no booze and possible bar closures during the tail end of the high season – but have instead focused on the sanuk side of the riots, or the soft-news stories if you will. It’s a lot more fun than trying to remember which Thaksin crony is which. And while Thai battles Thai, if I paid attention to which political party is doing what I’d have missed the story of the Thai PBS journalist reporting that one fluffy local named “Foremost” was blinded by tear gas during one of those battles, while two of his fellow canine non-combatants at the nearby Marble Temple were suffering from irritated eyes and waiting to be rescued. Now we’re talking news that matters.

Whether the army gets involved is always a big game changer in Thai elections. Ooops, I mean coups. Ooops, I mean politics. Tanks in Bangkok’s streets are never a good thing, an armed military force on street corners isn’t either. That’s the kind of news that makes visitors rethink their travel plans. Unless instead you focus on how hot Thai mean look in uniform. Throw in all the Boys In Brown in their skin tight threads and we’re talking eye candy worth braving any political upheaval thrown your way. And with all those boys deployed into Thailand’s capital city, you know during their downtime they’ll be looking for a bit of sanuk too.

While your best bet is to stay uninvolved if you are in Bangkok right now, that’s difficult to do when a party is going on. And despite the occasional clashes between opposing forces, that is what most of the protest encampments look like: a party. So just in case you want to have a bit of fun and join in on the protestor’s side of the fete, you should know there’s an app for that. Whistle for Thai creates a high-pitched whistling sound, and allows users to find other whistle-blowers using GPS. It’s almost as much sanuk as using Grindr.

The embattled prime minister, the maybe-he’s-crazy opposition leader Suthep, the not-a-hunk and we’re-not-involved-(yet) leader of Thailand’s army, are all faces of the unrest Thailand is going through right now and each is worthy of the media’s focus if you are attempting to make sense out of the goings on. But if sanuk is your goal, none of those faces can compete with the oddly alluring chubby buttocks of Weerachart ‘Kob’ Premkamol an anti-government protester whose story – as we say in the press – has, um, legs.

Weerachart, a 33-year-old motorcycle taxi driver, gained his 15 minutes of fame during a skirmish on Ratchadamnoen Avenue. Now being lionized by anti-government protestors – and affectionately being called Mr. Underpants – photos of Kob battling the police in not only not a yellow shirt but nothing more than his Calvin’s made the news that really counts. “It happened on Saturday,” Kob says. “I joined the mob early in the morning and got hit by tear gas, so I had to take my clothes off and wash myself. Then I saw this old lady who was on the ground because the effect of tear gas.”

Loading up with 15 fire extinguishers, Kob charged back to the front line to help the woman up and then started firing his extinguishers at the cops from behind a barrier. “When police saw me, they were like “Are you crazy? Why aren’t you wearing pants?’” he said, adding that after he returned later, the police had a new nickname for the chubby demonstrator. “They referred to me as ‘fattie’ ever since,” he says. After recovering from the tear gas, Kob was admitted to the hospital, but returned to Ratchadamnoen three hours later to announce reports of his death had been greatly exaggerated.

That’s the story I’m going with and I’m sticking to it.

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