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Money and sex are more interconnected than what you may have thought.

Money and sex are more interconnected than what you may have thought.

Those of high moral standards (aka Christians of whom Christ would want nothing to do with) are not big on prostitution. They will tell you it is a degrading profession that leads to crime, drug use, child abuse, and – other than homosexuality – is your quickest path to Hell. And despite prostitution being the world’s oldest – and most popular among customers – profession, the general view of those who engage in the commercial sex scene is that they are lonely, socially inept, ugly and often ancient losers who wouldn’t have a sex life if not for their wallet. Which may be true in Pattaya. As well as in the U.S. House of Representatives. But those who study the sex life of others shows differently. Customers of prostitutes are not that easily pigeonholed. The span all age groups and all economical levels. Some are even attractive enough they could turn a few bucks themselves by turning tricks. Which begs the question: Can something that feels so good really be all that bad?

Yup, smells like science to me.

Those men in little white coats have proved in the past that an active sex life is important to your well-being. Getting laid makes you happy (and yes, someone got a shit load of government grant money for figuring that out). We now know a regular exchange of body fluids helps strengthen your immune system too. And now, thanks to Nick Drydakis, a senior lecturer in economics at Anglia Ruskin University at Cambridge, we also know that getting lucky is also good for your wallet. No mater what that happy ending costs you.

Working with the Institute for the Study of Labor in Bonn, Germany, Drydakis found from studying the responses regarding health, sexual activity, employment status, and earnings from 7,500 people aged 26 to 50 – which included both straight and gay men – that not having enough sex can lead to loneliness, social anxiety, and depression. More importantly he found that getting laid tends to make people more confident and social, which can translate into positive professional qualities; those with a great sex life are more likely to be more confident, emotionally stable, and focused at work than someone who spends his nights crying and masturbating over a 15-year-old poster of Brad Pitt. And better yet, Drydakis’ research showed that people who have sex at least four times a week made 5% more in wages than their less sexually active counterparts.

Ca-Ching!

Think of that orgasm you just paid for as money in the bank.

Think of that orgasm you just paid for as money in the bank.

Drydakis’ findings held true even when factors such as education and profession were taken into account. And while his research also showed people who make happy endings a regular part of their life are likely to be healthier with fewer limitations such as diabetes, heart diseases and arthritis, his study also revealed that even people who have health problems earn more if they have regular sex. Drydakis also discovered that those whose sex life really sucked earned 3.2% less than those who got off at least once or twice a week. Whodathunk orgasms could be so profitable, even when you are paying for them?

Not that Drydakis specifically addressed where those orgasms were coming from and whether or not they were paid for. That bit of research undoubtedly will be saved for the next round of government grant funding. But he did make several observations on why sex and earnings are linked. And it’s easy to connect the dots. Firstly, Drydakis said that it could be because people who earn more have the disposable income to go on more ‘dates’. Secondly, he felt it could be because people who earn more are more attractive to potential partners. And thirdly, he theorized that the reason could be that men with higher wages are better able to buy their partner gifts and that they are rewarded with sex. Which pretty well defines the customer/bar boy dynamic.

Research and scientific theory are all good and well, but how does that translate to the real world? Well, if you make $50,000 a year, $2,500 of that then is thanks to the memories provided by the working men in Thailand. Or in a currency you may better understand: roughly 38 long-time offs. Which means if you make three trips to Thailand each year, the additional wages you earn thanks to the happy endings you pay for works out to about a dozen orgasms per trip. Which in turn means those moments of pure ecstasy ain’t actually costing you a dime.

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