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Cheap but crappy wi-fi is available in Mexico City.

We can all agree that bigger is better. Always. Speed, on the other hand, is good in somethings, not so good in others. Recognizing that speed is paramount in internet connectivity, Mexico City has come up with a way to provide citizens with free blazingly fast wi-fi. It’s their reward for how quickly they pick up after their pet in the city’s parks.

Ad agency DDB teamed up with Mexican Internet Portal Terra (MIPT) in an attempt to clean up the parks of Mexico City from dog droppings by rewarding those who make an effort to clean up after their pets. The company has been installing dog poop waste receptacles that not only accept the droppings, but weigh it too. The calculated weight determines how much free wi-fi time the pooper scooper earns. And you thought your internet provider was shitty.

GIGO (Garbage In Garbage Out) has been a standard ever since personal computers hit the market place. MIPT has just taken it to an new extreme. And the community has responded in similar fashion. Recognizing that they are dealing with a stupid machine, many people have been depositing rocks instead of dog shit to get their free wi-fi time. Which is a pretty crappy thing to do. But then that’s better than force-feeding your dog laxatives just so you have enough time online to download a full clip of porn. MIPT says it is aware of the ruse but that as long as the city’s parks are getting cleaner their efforts are not going to waste.

stepped in it

Poops I Did It Again!

And just in case you thought this was a shitty post, I thought I’d dump another one on you. Sometimes words are just not enough to express how you really feel. Thanks to someone’s creative but twisted mind a quick visit to the website below provides you the opportunity of creating your own special graphic to attach to the next email you send to someone who pisses you off.

http://www.notrealnews.co.uk/fun-games/virtual-dogshit-creator/

Anyone can Google a photo of dog shit. But for a truly satisfactory experience nothing beats creating your very own pile of crap. The site proves options to choose from including the size of the dog, consistency, viscosity, density, how long it has been steaming, and the all important meat/rusk ration.

Hours of entertainment for the entire family, it’s kind of a shame Beachlover is no longer with us, this site would have saved his little fingers from a lot of typing and the resulting posts would have smelled just the same.

Feel free to give it a try, but despite what you think I am not dumber than shit, so don’t try to be cute by posting your creation as a comment.

I can only hope that someone who got their free wi-fi time from depositing their dog droppings in Mexico is using that time to create some virtual poop – it just has such a karma-like ring to it.

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