Related Posts You Might Enjoy:
The recent bump to an article I wrote about Tony Jaa sent me off to Google to find out what the sudden interest was. Tony has been a busy boy this year. He got married in May and his pregnant bride got into a fight with his sister’s boyfriend to make it a festive occasion (why do I miss all the good weddings?). Tony also has a new movie scheduled for release in December. No, make that May of next year. Huh. Well, the good news is that it’s a sequel to The Protector, so no more Thai mysticism this time around. Let’s just hope Tony got his old body back too.
For those of you lucky enough to be in Bangkok on November 9th, a Royal Barges procession will be held on the Chao Phraya culminating at Wat Arun. This event was scheduled for last year and then postponed because of the flooding. Richard Barrow has mapped out the best viewing spots if you plan on being one of the thousands who turn out for this event.
While I’m on the subject of movies, Stay is an eight minute short film about a pair of young Chinese guys who though happy together have never spent a night with each other in the same bed. When one asks his boyfriend to stay . . .
I plugged Ilbonito’s blog a while ago, and am gonna do it again. It has become one of my regular reads, and you may enjoy it too. His posts are not always about Thailand, but those that are a good mix of stuff I wasn’t aware of and of old haunts which often brings back pleasant memories. Best of all, unlike some (me) he’s mastered the art of brevity. Check out The Hot Mango Men of Silom, and then spend some time browsing his older posts. You’ll be glad you did.
Frankie To is a talented photographer who beautifully captures the virile handsomeness of young Asian men. Huh. I guess I don’t really have to say any more.
I haven’t mentioned the Olympics for at least two weeks now, but do have to say the Olympian studs are gonna have a hard time going up against the hot local men in four years when the Games are held in Brazil. Olympic bulges can’t hold a candle to Brazilian bulges. And even the fauna is in on the act. Can you say Manaconda?
While I was home schooled on the subject, it never hurts to expand your knowledge. And sometimes can even feel pretty good: The Top Ten Wanking Tips. And yes, the tip is involved in several of them.
Iceland is #1. Ireland is better than Switzerland. Thailand is worse than Rawanda and 125 other countries. The 2012 Global Peace Index gages the level of safety and security in society and also looks at the extent of domestic or international conflict. Indicators range from a nation’s level of military expenditure to its relations with neighboring countries and the level of respect for human rights.
With daytime temperatures dropping into the upper 60s in California, I’ve been freezing my ass off this week. You’d think having just got back from Alaska again it’d feel tropical, but no. Friends back east are already tired of hearing me whine about temperatures they strip down to shorts for, much like my attitude toward Thais when it hits the upper 70s in Bangkok. So I had to ask Google if it ever snowed in Thailand. That should be worth a few shots off bar bets.
Related Posts You Might Enjoy:
A few weeks ago via a link to an article I’d found on the internet, I briefly touched upon fang muk (no pun intended). In the real world, I briefly touched on fang muk too. There was a muscle bound bar boy at Hot Mail whom I offed who unveiled that not so little surprise when we got back to my hotel room. Unsure of exactly what I was dealing with, our time together was short, and I never bothered to off him when he moved to Tawan a few months later. Fortunately I’ve never had the pleasure of that experience again, but statistically there should be numerous peni that have been enhanced with fang muk in my future. I’m not sure how I feel about that. Or how they will feel.
But knowing the odds are against me, I thought I should do a bit of research, at least enough to know the difference between fang muk and genital warts (though if I had my choice I’d avoid both like the plague). Boys and their toys, go figure – the phenomenon of men inserting little balls of glass, metal or pearls beneath the skin of their penis is not uncommon in Thailand, and it’s practiced throughout SE Asia and parts of Asia too. The Filipinos call them bolitas, in Japan they are known as tancho balls, and Korean men call them chagan balls. The more modern term is pearling, but historically they were known as Burma bells and their use originated in Burma and what is now Northern Thailand. Perhaps it is not surprising that those areas of the world were this practice caught on are known for men of lesser stature; supposedly the purpose of fang muk are to provide women greater degrees of pleasure. Every centimeter helps when you start off small. More surprising considering their purpose, is that historically the advent of fang muk had much to do with homosexuality.
According to Ralph Fitch, an English merchant who visited Chiang Mai in the late 1500s when the city was under Burmese rule, it was considered quite fashionable for men to insert small bells made of copper or silver in their penis. He said these bells served two functions: for the greater gratification of the women, and to break their menfolk of their addiction to sodomy, an extremely common practice in the North of Thailand at that time with some historians even considering it to be the cause of the area’s sparse population.
The European record of fang muk use centers around the land of Pegu, which today is part of Burma, where several travellers recorded their experience with its common use. Flemish diamond trader Jaque de Coutre wrote that he had witnessed many men who wore at least two bells on the glans of the penis in both Pegu and Siam, which “look as big as nuts and their sound is very clear.” He was told the inventor was a queen of Pegu who took several unusual steps to alleviate the widespread practice of homosexuality in her kingdom. By law, women had to wear an opened underskirt that exposed their thighs while walking (thinking the sight would entice men away from other men).
What’s good for the goose is good for the gander, so the male side of the equation began ornamenting their best buddies with bells; women would know when they passed a man who was interested in them from his sudden stiffy ringing out loud and clear. (Note that while there is no reference as to Burma bells being the predecessor of the modern door bell, the logic of the progression seems obvious.)
Other European records also mention penis bells among the Siamese, including those of Portuguese Tomeì Pires in 1515, the Florentine Francesco Cerletti’s observation of Siamese sailors in Macao in 1600, and the account of a Dutch visitor to 17th century Pattani – now Ayutthaya – who was so confused by the sight that he reported both that “men provided with these bells never have had intercourse with women,” and also that “women experience a sensual enjoyment beyond words on account of these bells”. Most reported however that men who did not sport bells were sodomites and were not considered good prospects for marriage. So it appears it was not a question of belling the catamite as the Dutchman reported.
The Eastern historical record took note of both fang muk and Burmese bells, starting with the report of the former by Zhou Zhizhong during his travels in the 14th century who said it was customary among the men of Siam to ”cut their penis to insert eight gems, so that people will marry their daughters to them.” Another Chinese voyager, Ma Huan, visited Ayutthaya in 1433 and reported in great detail not only on the use of fang muk but on the procedure of implantation noting that there were “a class of men who open shops to specialize in inserting and soldering these beads for people; and they do it as a profession.”
According to his account, the more wealthy citizens had beads of gold or silver inserted in their penis, often hollow with a small pebble inside so that when they walked around they made a tinkling sound, which was considered quite beautiful. Or as Julie Andrews would put it, the hills are alive with the sound of music. It was a century and a half later that Coutre visited the same area and found the use of fang muk still much in favor. Use of Burmese bells in Thailand, Laos, and Burma continued to be documented by travellers to the region well into the late 1700s.
The historical record of use of fang muk in Thailand drops off at the beginning of the 1800s, perhaps the mode of body decoration fell from favor, or perhaps visitors to the Kingdom were less interested in the peni of Thai men. Perhaps too it was Jackie Kennedy’s observation that “Pearls are always appropriate” that led to the modern day use of fang muk and their and popularity. But I’m guessing on that one.
The use of fang muk was again brought to the eye of the Western public in 1990 during research on risky sexual behavior and HIV infection. One research paper reported fang muk are mostly common among drug addicts, with “one in two of those Chiang Mai methamphetamine users interviewed for the paper reporting they had either scarred their penis, inserted a fang muk, or injected their penises with oil or wax.” While the paper did note the practice was more common in Northern Thailand than elsewhere in the country, it also concluded that rather than pleasuring women it hurt them, that fang muk were responsible for the spread of HIV, and that they frequently lead to condom breakages, leading one to believe the researcher was more interested in landing employment with a self-righteous NGO than in scientific accuracy; tweekers rarely have much interest in anything other than their next hit and it is generally agreed that sex holds little interest to them.
Other researchers into the use of fang muk report that it is mostly confined to working class men and those in the military and/or who have spent time in prison. In fact, in Thailand men with penis inserts are perceived to be those who are, or have been, involved in criminal groups. The practice is widely reported to occur in prison, with one reference to forced penis inserts being a normal occurrence for new inmates in Bangkhwang Prison. One study found that 80 percent of participants who had penile modifications had fang muk implanted in prison or detention, and that the same percentage reported having the procedure performed by friends in prison. A prisoner interviewed on the subject estimated one in three men serving time sported fang muk. This practice among the prison population may partially be due to the wide-held belief that in Japan, Yakuza (Japanese Mafia) insert pearls underneath the skin of their penises for each year spent in prison.
So what are the chances you’ll run across fang muk during your adventures in Thailand? Probably greater up north than in Bangkok, and to an even lesser degree down south. But even then I wouldn’t get my hopes up, or become concerned. I’ve only run across one guy sporting dick pearls so far, and while there was a report of a bar boy at X-Boys who had them a few years ago, it doesn’t seem to be a popular tradition among bar boys. But then again maybe I just haven’t met the right ones.
Related Posts You Might Enjoy:
Unfortunately, it happens. The hottie at the bar that got you all excited and worked up, who oozed sex appeal and promised he did everything, gets back to your hotel room with you and is a total flop. He fails to rise to the occasion, acts as though you are not in the room, and does not want to do anything other than accept his tip and flee. It is a bad beginning to what was supposed to be a happy ending and it leaves you sexually frustrated and irate.
Back home in your own culture you’d instantly know how to react. But this is Thailand. And you’re not in Kansas anymore. What should you do? Get mad? Get even? Get the hell out of Dodge? Here are the top ten options for handling a studly bar boy who turns out to be a dud:
1. Smile, Say Nothing, And Tip The Guy As You Usually Would.
Seriously? What a pussy! But fine, if you lack the balls to stand up over his lack of ability to stand up you’re probably a bottom and used to rolling over and taking it anyway. The bonus in selecting this option is the boy will probably fall madly in love with you and you will be assured a long relationship spanning decades. During which you’ll never get your rocks off with his participation. But ain’t love grand?
2. Smile, Say Nothing, And Tip The Guy As You Usually Would, And Then Immediately Go Post About What A Dud He Is On the Gay Thailand Forums.
The guys who pull this trick are usually the posters of whom most already feel great pity for any bar boy who has to spend time with them. Your complaint will probably mean his business doubles. You’ll get a sweeter degree of revenge by sending a PM to select members – the posters nobody would want as a customer – and telling them he is perfect for them. Just imagine his reaction when he agrees to a short-time off with say, Fountainhall. He’ll perform no better for him, but will have to listen to a two hour dissertation on the history of men’s underwear. If you want revenge, always use a properly loaded gun.
3. Throw A Tantrum And Immediately Head Back To The Bar To Yell At The Mamasan And Demand Your Money Back.
Or, for short: Throw a Hissy Fit. Which many queens excel at. If I’m in town, this is the option I’d most strongly recommend you take. The fuck shows have become quite boring for me but the sight of a gaggle of fem bar boys beating the crap out of a fussy old queen is something no one ever tires of.
4. Ignore His Flaccid State and Pleas; Force Yourself On Him Anyway.
Did you know Thailand leads the world in penis mutilation by a sex partner? Just saying.
5. Send Him To The Shower And Steal His Cell Phone When He’s Not Looking.
Yeah, I know payback is always sweet. But duds are not to be trusted; he probably stole your cell phone too and got away with a newer and better model. On the plus side, at least you will have gotten fucked.
6. Accept The Lack of Orgasm, But Demand He Pose Naked for Your Camera, And Then Upload All Those Pix On The Internet. Or At Least Email Them To Me.
I’ve never actually heard of this approach being used, but thought I’d throw it out there because there can never be too many pictures of hot naked Thai men on the internet. Or on my computer.
7. Recognize He Too Is Human And May Be Just Having An Off Night.
That’s nice. You probably believe in world peace too. And undoubtedly the boys often tell you what a good heart you have. The nice thing about this attitude is that if you go back to his bar again the stud who was a dud will have a long line of his friends for you to off. You’ll never achieve an orgasm, but just think how well you’ll think about yourself. Interesting how masturbation does not always require the involvement of your dick, huh?
8. Wave A Thousand Baht Note Under His Nose And Watch Him Rise To The Occasion.
Note that this trick only works on new bar boys and never in Pattaya. The experienced and those whose crappy karma landed them in Pattaya all know there is no way your cheap ass is ever gonna hand over that amount of cash. Okay, so yes, in Thailand money is an aphrodisiac, but a thousand baht or two is not always enough to gain the full cooperation of your boy du jour. An ATM card waved under his nose, however, will almost always do the trick.
9. Resort To Threats.
Similar to throwing a hissy fit, anguished cries filled with threats such as I’m going to tell your boss, I’m going to report you to the police, are always a good option. As long as your intent was to reward your dud with laughter. He knows that despite what you threaten to do you are no more likely to actually do those things than he was likely to perform to the degree he told you he would back in the bar.
10. Short Tip Him Just Enough That He’ll Know You’re Not Happy, And Shake Your Head In Deep Sorrow.
If you haven’t yet learned so, yelling, screaming, and becoming irate is not an acceptable release of your emotions in Thailand. It gets you nowhere. And any Thai who observes you ranting and carrying on will be embarrassed for you. That shouldn’t be news. All the guide books tell you this. But what no one bothers to explain is how you should act to show your displeasure. And the name of that game is shame. Reign in your inborn sense for drama, a subtle approach is required. He already knows he failed to live up to expectations and/or tried to pull a fast one. Now he’ll know you do too and that you are embarrassed to have witnessed his error in judgement and faulty behavior. This is the Thai equivalent of being kicked in the balls.
Your bonus option is one often offered by the punters on the Gay Thailand forums who like to appear level headed and above the fray. They say you should tip the guy as you normally would and be happy with whatever he was willing to do, even if that was nothing. Fine. Yes, you are dealing with a human being, not a commodity. But it is still a purchase and service is still service. If you ordered a Big Mac at McDonalds and got a Quarter Pounder instead, would you be just as happy to have been served junk food loaded with thousands of worthless calories that will lead you to an early death even though it was not the junk food loaded with thousands of worthless calories that will lead you to an early death that you wanted and paid for? No. You wouldn’t. And you’d let Ronald know about it too.
The idea that you should just be happy with however your evening turns out is a false humanity. The meek may inherit the earth, but they’ll never be sexually satisfied. Failing to take the boy to task makes you complicit in the increase of bar boys who fail to perform but expect to be handed a big wad of baht anyway. And as much as I hate to think about diving into your sloppy seconds, that means I may some day be dealing with the dud you rewarded for poor service. And know that we’re talking about my orgasm, it just ain’t funny anymore.
Related Posts You Might Enjoy:
Related Posts You Might Enjoy:
Whodathunk that some twenty-five or so years later the results of my initial research into Bangkok gay bars would finally be relevant? Having already visited Bangkok a few times, and having already visited a few straight bars that offered paid companionship, it was high time to prepare for trying out a gay club. But where were they? And what were they? The internet was still in its infancy, but Dreaded Ned’s was up, running, and offered locations as well as a basic primer on the city’s hot spots of interest to horny gay men. Still a newbie to Bangkok, the only problem was none of it made sense. Beer bar, host bar, gogo bar, club, disco, and pub? All I wanted to know was where the hot guy could be found, and what it would cost me once I found them.
Experience is sometimes the best teacher. It didn’t take long, or too many visits to the smattering of gay night life establishments the city had to offer before the plethora of bar type choices began to make sense. It didn’t take long or too many visits to discover that regardless of the type of place it was, it was part of the city’s commercial sex scene either. Pubs and clubs may not have been an official part of the industry, but moneyboys didn’t seem to care and hung out there anyway. However any of the places were identified, if it sashayed like a duck it meant there were hot, willing, and available guys to be had. And in the end, isn’t that all that really matters?
In those days there weren’t as many choices of places to visit and few were grouped together. The Telephone Bar and eventually Balcony were pubs on Soi 4 where you could go for a drink, a bit of socializing with friends, and make new friends, many of whom turned out to be moneyboys. DJ Station and the Freeman Club were discos that later became dance clubs and were where you went to dance your ass off as well as making new friends, many of whom turned out to be moneyboys. With some dyke friends in tow, I finally visited a host bar in some far flung corner of the city; it was low key, upscale, and I almost choked on my beer when one of the studs explained how much it would cost to have him spend the night with me. Once I finally hit a gogo bar, the rest fell to the wayside. But I never did find a gay beer bar in Bangkok.
Soi 4’s pubs have not changed much. The discos are now called dance clubs. Even in Bangkok, host bars were and still are always more geared toward a local clientele and never made much of a splash in the more heavily touri populated areas. Beer bars, once an elusive form of establishment, however, are on the rise. The punters on the gay forums like to predict the downfall of gay nightlife in Bangkok. But the truth is the scene is evolving and growing as it always has. And surprisingly, where gogo bars once held sway, all of the variations of night life establishments are today becoming an integral part of the scene. And for a handful of baht, you can still get laid at any and all of them. At a few, you may even get it for free.
For the newbie to Bangkok’s world of gay bars, knowing which type of place is which once again – or maybe for the first time – matters. With their need to know in mind, it seems like a good time to define yet again the types of gay establishments you’ll find in Bangkok.
I refer to them as gay pubs to define their difference from other types of establishments, though for most these are the closest to what you’d call a gay bar back home. The grand dames are still Telephone and Balcony on Silom Soi 4, with an overflow of like places along the soi that tend to come and go. I’d have to add both Maxi’s and Dick’s Cafe over on Soi Twilight to this group, the main difference being their location and the type of eye candy walking by.
Pubs are where you go with travel mates or friends for a quick bite to eat or to while away the evening with a cold beer or two. They are places to socialize with old friends, or to make new friends with fellow travellers. Most have both an indoor and outdoor seating area, with the outdoor areas usually filling up fast since they are a great place to people watch. Not quite the meat-market pick-up scene of gay bars back in the States, you can score here, but that’s not really their purpose. And while local gay boys do frequent the pubs, most are moneyboys looking for customers.
Prices for booze at pubs are more in line with what you’ll pay at non-gay non-commercial sex bars and restaurants in town. So cheaper by far than what it will cost you at a gogo bar. Paid companionship too is cheaper, there is no off-fee and the guys working pubs are free-lancers who will often be happy for half of what you’d be expected to tip at a gogo bar. Your safety in hiring a moneyboy outside of the few protections offered from host, beer, and gogo bars is something you need to consider and determine for yourself.
When you’ve sat long enough at one of the pubs on Soi 4, and the hour grows late enough, it’s time to move to DJ Station, still Bangkok’s #1 dance club for gay touri. If you still refer to these type of places as a disco, you won’t have quite as easy of a time meeting new friends, but providing you are willing to pay for their services, will have plenty of young hotties to choose from. Not that you’ll never find a new friend who isn’t looking to add to his bank account. The younger you are the better chance you’ll have, but with the right attitude even an old geezer can find friendly companionship at the clubs.
When the scene at DJ’s begins to die, the party moves to G.O.D. on Soi 2. As do all the moneyboys who have not yet landed a customer for the night. So do the horny local boys who aren’t looking for a fee, so your odds may even go up at G.O.D. Especially when the early morning hours come to a close.
Your cost for your night’s pleasure will be the same as what it would’ve cost you if you finished the night off at one of Bangkok’s pubs, and the AYOR aspects of taking a new friend back to your hotel with you are the same too.
Host bars are gogo bars without the gogo. Kinda sorta. The only host bar in the Silom area I know of is My Way, which has been around for decades. There are numerous host bars in the Sapahan Kwai area, many of which are dual-billed as karaoke bars. Host bars, like gogo bars, are there to provide you with a companion for the evening. The guys working at host bars are employees of the bar and are usually dressed in everyday clothing, though some may be shirtless. Host bars do not put on shows, nor will you find any of the nudity typical of a gogo bar. I differentiate between a host bar and a beer bar by form: host bars are not open to the street, beer bars always are. Their function is almost identical.
Historically host bar prices for both alcohol and companionship are lower than what you’d pay at a gogo bar, and higher than your costs at a pub.
If a host bar is a gogo bar without the gogo, then a massage shop is a host bar with a happy ending. At some, you can even get a massage. I think the lack of hosts bars, and their lack of popularity, is largely due to the many massage places around the city. The scenario is much the same: you walk in, pick a guy from the line-up – or have one assigned to you – and then pray for nirvana. The only difference is that at a massage place you finish your business on the premises (though at most you may also indulge in the take-away experience).
One of the pluses to massage shops is that most are open during daytime hours. So you don’t have to wait for night to satisfy your itch. Another is that the cost of your happy ending is a bit less than what the same orgasm would cost you at a gogo bar.
I’m not sure saunas belong in this mix, but since you can find an orgasm or two there too, I’ll cover them briefly anyway. Babylon is the king, or maybe that’s queen, for touri. Others cater to a local and/or mixed crowd and have their fans too. If you are looking for companionship without the accompanying costs, one of the saunas are your best bet. Not that you won’t find moneyboys there too, but local gay guys who are just looking to get off without much ado are far more numerous. You may even strike up a friendship with a hottie that will extend beyond the walls of the sauna.
Larger, glitzier, and more explicit seemed to be the way the scene was going in Bangkok for years. Gogo bars ruled and while some opened and closed from one trip to the next, there were always new ones to take their place. The idea that beer bars – especially on Soi Twilight – would ever become the norm was not the expected outcome, at least in my opinion. But then I’ve never been that good at picking stocks either.
Where once beer bars for gay clientele were few and far between in Bangkok, Soi Twilight alone now hosts a good half dozen. Two that barely qualified have been operating at the mouth of the soi for years, Hot Male’s downstairs open-air bar and directly across the soi, the Banana Club. I say barely qualify because part of the beer bar operation includes local guys to off and neither have ever been heavily populated by offable guys. But then traditionally, that is part of the difference between a beer bar and a host bar too. At beer bars, free-lancers were always welcome and made up the majority of those bars’ stables. The newer beer bars that have sprung up along the soi have hosts employed by the bar as well as free-lancers who work them.
The growing popularity of gay beer bars in Bangkok is thanks to three things. The world’s economy has taken a downturn and visitors are a little more careful about the money they spend; both drinks and guys are less expensive at a beer bar than at a gogo bar. Additionally, and partly because of the economic state of the world, more and more visitors from Asia are hitting Bangkok and less and less visitors are from western countries; beer bars are a friendlier, more approachable type of entertainment especially to visitors from neighboring SE Asian countries. And lastly, as difficult as it may be for a newbie to picture, the extreme sex shows put on by gogo bars for many have become boring. Hard to believe, but after your initial few visits it doesn’t take long to become jaded. So why pay the additional costs of hitting a gogo bar when you can have just as much fun, and find the guy you want even quicker, at a beer bar?
GOGO BARS:Despite the advent of beer bars, gogo bars are here to stay. Nowhere else in the world can you see hot guys naked, hard, and in action like in the shows at Bangkok’s gay gogo bars. And though compared to the city’s other types of venues gogo bars are more costly, compared to anything similar elsewhere in the world they are incredibly cheap. And incredibly exciting and sensual for newbies.
Gogo bars, whether on the ground floor or up a rickety flight of stairs are always indoor affairs; what goes on inside is not something to be casually viewed by those strolling down the street. They are not the place to go to meet other travellers or make a new friend or two, though if you are willing to pay for the pleasure the guys you meet there are more than friendly. And there is a gogo bar for every taste.
Some gogo bars specialize in twinks, others in male model-like physiques. Some offer a stable of guys who spend most of their free time lifting weights, others offer a little bit of everything. And the smaller bars down the street from Tawan will serve you with a high dose of sleaze (and at a reduced price to boot!)
As a first time visitor to Bangkok you may want to start off easy, hot a pub, maybe work your way up to the relative amiability of a beer bar. But don’t leave Bangkok without taking in at least one gogo bar show. You will be hooked. And you will come back for more.
Related Posts You Might Enjoy: